Tag Archives: awakening

Circles of transition

moon shasta redding real estate

Life has had me intensely in Her grip in past weeks. As for many of us, it seems. Huge transitions have been in play in all levels of my world, much of which remain quiet, integrating within.  And I have come to realise that this is equally the intensity that is moving in the collective as polarities in consciousness actually are pulled together to explode into what is true.

It has been a time of the circle. Completions and beginnings both interweave and overlay; one and the same. Timelines merge. The layers opening in recent times across so many levels have called for every bit of my energy and sometimes more.  On the third day of landing in California, dissolution happened in a vivid way. What seemed almost insanely intense, I slowly came to sense was not only (or even) personal. Of course, I had been under immense stress and pressure – relocating my family five thousand miles and much more – but I came to hear and feel of soul family equally cracking, weeping, dissolving, immobilised with exhaustion with striking power.  In this, I am grateful for the reminding that we are ever and always droplets in a moving, breathing, shifting ocean, each both drop and ocean, which brings some gentle comfort to the burning soul and aching body.

I find the invitation ever more vivid to be fully present to exactly what is – the raging; the holy fire; the inability to summon energy to function; the fury, despair, tenderness, quaking vulnerability, and always, always pulsing silently or loudly, – Love. Now I am beginning to drop tendrils into the Californian soil, to exhale, to soften into this more deeply. I feel my soul dropping deeper into my physicality, many aspects of my Self aligning. The threads that weave the invisible sanctuary in which Being can thrive are mysterious and many.

In these past days, the moon rose in her fullness over Mount Shasta. In Capricorn, she heralds a time of decision making; decisions that bring us closer to who we are and anchor our essence in the material plane in how we live and act. I have also very much been feeling the feminine flow of gentleness and softness, amplified by the Sacred mountain, even in her unrelenting transformative potency. The Mother sings her embrace of Sacred cadence simultaneously as we are lifted to make real life-directing decisions and to act upon them. The balance of the masculine and feminine feels more rooted in life than ever before.

I am but a “newcomer” in this life to living in the embrace of the mountain, with aeons of learning to rediscover and forge anew. In this apprenticing, I observe in one day the movements between softest Grace and fierce fire. Opening up all the way to exactly what is showing up here and now, however discomfiting, opens us – parts of us we know well – to devastation. What feels like devastation can open in a breath. And what remains? What is beneath and around; caressing, whispering and wrapping its unyielding arms around all? The more fully one can BE right here, – without restriction, without the cloud of story, – the torrent of the Cosmos can wash away more stones, more dust, more veils of attachment to identity or belief.

What is left, is Life itself, without interpretation and the film of understanding.  Indescribable, indefinable beauty.  Direct. Alive. Without limit.

Dying and being reborn we are. Infinitely.

Helen offers one to one sessions globally. Explore more and book at www.helenquail.com or facebook. The next cycle of events will come to fruition and be posted on her site in due course.

 

 

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love note

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Just know that you are not alone.

Whatever you are feeling, however seemingly dense and impenetrable; if you are exhausted; emotional; feeling lost; wrestling in challenging body symptoms. The distortions up for releasing in the collective are epic.. Along with our own personal blueprints for soul growth and evolution…

We bleed, we cry, we get bone weary. And we get back up again.

None of it is personal.

Breathe deep into the space that is always here. The Love that infuses every aching corner, even in the darkest shadows.

Allow it all and believe nothing.

This is what we came for.

Reach out to Helen through her site or facebook.  She holds healing and transformational space with groups and individuals globally.

Grace and Desire

 

Joma Sipe - LUMINE STELLARUM 2015 light of the stars

Artist – Joma Sipe

There is a dance at the heart of every awakening Being. Of the eternal longing to KNOW and BE the fullness of our absolute Divinity – in form. And the fear and aching grief of the countless times we have felt that we have fallen short of the immeasurable.

As I ponder deeply into this well once more with Beloved souls, I witness the voice within that still – and always – speaks to being not enough. The hallmark of ego – not good enough; there is always something or some place that is better. Something to strive for (and therefore some failing in that there is always a place to reach for).

I have hugely more compassion and love for this expression of self that needs to be heard. I understand her somewhat more, her voice so very familiar. Indeed the voice that led and shaped my life for the first decades. I am again and again practising calling her and all her pain into the unconditional embrace of Love. Perhaps this will be a lifelong embrace.

And as I slow and breathe bigger, She is Here. She who has no name, no identity. Indeed no voice as Her voice is all voices. She is the stars. She is the blackness that absorbs everything. She is the magnitude of the Earth, Her soft, moist fecundity merging with any sense of this body.

Longing and longed for re-member into what Is, always.

Helen is honoured to serve through one to one consultations in person and globally. A programme of events for 2018 is currently germinating. You can sign up for occasional mailings and find out more about her work at her site, also about to be reconstructed.  Or connect on facebook.

1111 Awakening through Life

holding-world

As I returned to my writing screen, it was 11.11 – a significant portal for the awakening frequencies of the Divine to be received and integrated by humanity. The 111 codes ask us to be utterly conscious of our dreams, our thoughts and our words and to ensure that our movements in the physical realms, whether word or action come from our highest expression and awareness of consciousness.

I always feel 111 and 11.11 related to new beginnings. For of course consciousness is the Creator, the beginning, the manifester. And simultaneously completely outwith any concept of time. The reality which is present in every breath is heightened – that we are given the chance to begin afresh. This, not in terms of denying exactly where we are and all the circumstances we have created to be at this precise point, but rather arising FROM every thought and action that has gone before. As every nutrient and day of gestation creates an entirely new Being in human form on the planet when a baby is born, so all our choices and seeming failures to act in the highest alignment create the perfect, optimum conditions for this deep birthing.

It is also now eight days since my mother passed from her human body.

And six since America voted for Donald Trump to be its president.

None of it unrelated.

One of the gifts of these last days at my mother’s bedside is the knowing which may previously have drifted into being more intellectual, that EVERYTHING in my experience, in my world, is interconnected. This has dropped right down into my belly. Into absolute knowing.

My mother’s transition and the profound experiences that took place towards it; the water protectors and protests at Standing Rock; uncomfortable tensions with my siblings; my deep soul love and alchemy with my partner; my children expressing challenging responses and behaviours; my ex husband not showing up fully as a father; a dear soul sister leaving the country; the political coup in Turkey and the American elections.

All of it.

Let me breathe this circle.  Sit with me here. In the centre. When we return to this still point, we feel our column of light anchoring both into Gaia’s heart and that of Source. We reclaim our infinite strength as Divine beings playing in this human movie for a few moments. From here, we can watch the dance of all that is playing out in these movies on the world stage and on the more “personal” stage of our private lives.

A tricky and essential distinction to navigate is that of witnessing and knowing this is all illusion yet not falling into spiritual bypassing. This is sold seductively in new age thinking and often can creep into us without our noticing. At the other end of the loop is getting caught in the drama of the collective and letting ourselves believe any of it is actually real. How to acknowledge and honour pain in any Being without losing sight and knowing of what is real? Can we remember that everything is created by Divine intelligence for the evolution of consciousness?

We – as embodiments of Divine Source are here as co-creators, with free will and living in form surrounded by the density of soul amnesia. This earth school journey is one to bring Divinity into form. To live it in our human-ness – our ability to FEEL intensely; to cry and dance and laugh and make love. What a magical, majestic and joyful play we are in!

Dancing this balance is an art form that requires practice till the moment our essence leaves this plane. We can never be complacent, for the cumulative weight of conditioning rains into our bones and cells each and every day. We never become immune to that but hopefully, with dedicated intention and practices, we learn to soften it, to understand it and – crucially – not to identify with it. Perhaps we may even learn to love the healthy ego structures that allow us to function as human and in community. And anything that shows up on our personal or global horizon as manifestations of that which wishes to be acknowledged and loved into harmony.

We are all in uncharted waters in these new lands. Four years on from the 2012 gateway, we have another especially heightened window through to 1.1.17 to receive and embody higher Divine frequencies. None of this can be done when our inner work and our shadow work is not addressed at ALL levels. All are equally essential. So in the face of political instability and extremes; natural “disasters” and personal experiences of loved ones choosing to leave earth or relationships dissolving, we do our work. We walk our talk.

We let go of the temptations to judge, to feel ever so subtly “right”, vindicated or superior. We accept that every being on this planet is an equal expression of the magnificence of the Divine. That is why we are required to practice our mastery through every moment of our day (and night). Use the tools that best nourish you – particular meditations; body practices; time in nature and KNOW that you are part of a soul tribe, whether you know them directly or not. We have our families of light – many on earth, many more on other stars and galaxies. Remember to sing to each other the song of our hearts. To radiate the light of our souls, thus lighting the way for all of us who find it hard to see through the shadows at times.

Let light shine upon every heart awakening us to our true nature.

And so it is.

Helen is in service to consciousness and has a particular role with the frequencies of the Cosmic Divine Feminine. Offerings come through direct consultations and personal sessions (in person or Skype globally); gatherings, events and retreats worldwide; light transmissions and writing. Please connect through facebook or her website, where you can also signup for very occasional mailings to stay informed.

Mother of Mine

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Mother of Mine

Mother of all

You’ve tended us so carefully

So we don’t fall.

Caught us and loved us

and held us so tight

When the fears and the darkness loom in the night.

 

Mother of mine

both human and Divine,

always so humble, giving and kind,

You gave so many years to us all.

So many hours,

so many tears

were wiped away by the hand that knows only Love.

 

Mother of mine,

I am so grateful you are here

and even in death you chose well and clear.

So we have these moments, these hours, these days

to thank you and love you for teaching your ways.

 

Ways based on faith in the guiding Love of the Divine

on serving and giving with no thought of self.

Your strength, majestic as a mountain,

your grace like a billowing leaf

you inspire each of us

to reach for the Truth

 

Mother of Mine,

Beloved Divine

in your human-ness you are loved and cared for

till your last breath becomes one

with the great Cosmic breath.

A pulse that never ends

and will reverberate through my blood for ever.

 

Mother of Mine.

divine-mother

 

Dedicated to my mother, Mary on her 77th birthday today.

 

Helen serves consciousness as called. The forms include energy healing, Presence, transmissions, gatherings and writings. She is honoured to connect through facebook or her site, where you can also sign up for very occasional mailings on her schedule and offerings.

Falling into Love, I rise.

FB_IMG_1472852439400Falling into love, I rise.

Dropping  away the layers, I fall, cleansed, naked, revealed.

This love flows through me,

not “mine” to retain

nor “yours” to give,

but in our purification

and our dedication,

both,

we are called to the crucible

And to BE the crucible,

Through our union.

 

A melding of alchemies

that sparks conceptions

and evolution .

 

There is a power that ripples across the Cosmos,

emanating from the belly of Mother

and the breath of Father.

 

In declaring a whole souled “Yes!” to the Divine Power,

Grace may reveal infinitely .

She fills my chest with countless galaxies; my eyes with brilliant stars.

My skin is enlivened with the dust of God, my blood richer with the fire of Love.

It is done. It is.

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Helen serves consciousness. This appears through one to one consultations, global gatherings, light transmissions and writings. It would be a delight to connect through her site, where you can also sign up for very occasional mailings or on Facebook.

To hold the truth of essence without abandoning Self

Loving couple holdind on the hands and sunset

The Heart of the Goddess loves infinitely. She nurtures. She embraces all in this love. A vital distinction in the path of the awakening feminine is to hold space and call forth the masculine BUT not at the expense of her own integrity, safety, growth, evolution and freedom.

This is a matter firstly of revealing and softening the conditioning and archetypes; of breaking through outdated distorting and suffocating structures and reclaiming the freedom of who we know ourselves to be. Humanity and all creation has witnessed many repeating cycles of power flowing between masculine and feminine expressions of Source in form. We are in an epoch where it is possible to reclaim the Divine feminine and – I believe deeply in my body – for this to be received and find balance with a healed and whole expression of the masculine energies of Divinity. This is a point in “time” arrived across millions of years of evolution. It is the gateway we exist in where Divine Union truly is possible.

And it is a matter of LOVE. In our deep abiding love, especially as women, we can give so much, care so much. One of the first lessons showing up for any who enter a path of spiritual learning and growth is that of loving oneself. The cliché that we can only love others to the extent that we love ourself is very true. But many of us have received models of pouring our love outwards to others without an even greater in-pouring inwards – that seems to function to a certain degree – and is certainly the accepted “norm” in the world around us. And this can continue in the spiritual world as we open our heart and become more loving. What we find is that the deeper we go – the more we evolve – the more we are also called BACK. Back in and down to love more and more our OWN Self.

What we are relearning is that the deepest core expression and celebration of love lies in our own Being and loving our own heart. In all its crackedness, bitterness, shadowy places. In all its glory and magnificence. Its’ fury, its’ power, its’ tenderness. Its’ scars and tender places.Because we are experiencing love as the higher dimensional energy that it is, loving the 3d heart and all expressions of human-ness from and as the infinite one love.

Love is not sugar coated and fluffy but fierce Grace that flinches from nothing, holds nothing sacrosanct – no belief, no relationship, no behaviour. It calls us out again and again, with a compassion and laser focus that has no equal. Turn to me. Turn to me and do not turn away. Bring all of you.

So we are asked to look at again at all the places that have learned to love and be loved, to give and receive. And to stand naked ready to meet all those we do not know.

The more deeply and fiercely we liberate our essence as Love, we offer liberation to the unseen and unknown parts of our being. The wounded places that have remained in our subconscious until such a point that the love present calls them forth. Calls them forth AS love. As perfect expressions of the Divine speaking to the Divine. And we can find a place in us to truly, deeply welcome these limping, spitting, bleeding parts. We commit to not turning away in shame or judgement but stepping towards, embracing with pure love. With gratitude. Again and again.

The feminine collective consciousness is actively bringing to light the oldest of patterns and imbalances expressed through the (distorted) masculine. As awakening beings – especially for women – longing to return to the deepest knowing and experience of the Love that we are, we have commonly been conditioned to lose our identity, independence – emotional or financial – in romantic partnerships or marriage. In this now, we have the opportunity to completely redefine true healthy relationship – founded on whole and loving relationship with our own self  and mirrored in a much more healthy and rigorous balance with our Beloved partner.

So can we stand in presence and in our hearts, holding the knowing of who we are, and the mirror of Divine presence to the “other ” before us, and not drop back into the old, old patterns of giving everything for this love? We are asked to hold our own integrity above all else. This arises not only from getting clear on our core moral values and the meaning we ascribe to this life experience but from a deep and unconditional presence of love. For our self and for who Life has placed before us. Right now. And this is not emotional love, romantic love nor restricted by mental concepts of love.

Love – like “enlightenment” or the Divine – is by its very nature limitlessness.

At the heart is our deep self care. We are learning to create a sanctuary that is impenetrable by anything that is not Love.  One that holds both inner and outer being in safety, deep love and strength at all levels. To wrap safety around our tissues and fields that does not carry even the feintest trace of restriction or repression, that has no connection with fear; nor seeking security or control; that is rooted and grounded utterly in trust in Source itself. This is the safety we are held in as women (and men). If we choose it.

So we are tested and given the practice to walk with again and again. Can I hold this being in love yet not compromise my own light? Can I love myself deeply and whoever is before me as Love in form, yet not compromise the honouring of either of our essences?

As expressions of the Divine feminine can we continue to shine a beacon of light; radiate limitless love with neither expectation that the masculine will do or be “anything” nor hooking ourselves into any “outcome”? Can we do this yet know when to walk away at physical an emotional level for our own wholeness (and so theirs)?

Can I hold the truth of this man’s essence, let him be where he is without abandoning him or myself?

This Beloveds is our invitation.

Helen is a love and light worker, serving consciousness. She offers writings, worldwide events, retreats and one to one sessions. If you are interested in knowing more, or in details of 2016 programmes please see her site, fb or sign up for an occasional newsletter.