Tag Archives: embody

Birth day eve reflections

When I feel back into moments of this life
– as a sensitive, quiet five year old;
a rebellious fifteen year old;
as a single mother at eighteen;
severely ill at thirty;
and so many more….,
deeper places of tender compassion arise for the beauty of a Cosmic soul feeling lost in this world and what it appeared to be.

There was always an inner vibrating that knew, that knew, somewhere. A light that could not extinguish. But for many years it was not possible to even begin the infinite reconciliation of what it is to be a limitless Being of the Cosmos inhabiting bones, blood and skin.


Even as the journey of wholeness and  awakening moved along it was many years before the descent could begin. For the ground to be here. 


And in this, we are brought to everything. There is no where to go. Every place in our own system and psyche and to all the peaks and pools of human consciousness.


For so many of us, it has been so much easier to stay in other realms. With lifetimes of wisdom, and capacities that are vastly outwith what exists on this planet at this time it can seem incomprehensible that what we are can fully come in here. And thrive.
And some can’t.


Yet, for those who stay, we said yes.
We said yes Beloveds. So we come all the way. We are in this Mastery school , this gorgeous playground to come fully into this play as consciousness, as Divine Love, as Source.


We teach what we need to learn and so this core of embodiment has come more and more into the center of my work, and my joy to serve.  As I guide and support Beings to come home in our multi dimensionality, right here , I come more and more home to my own soul song.


We are embodied light, meeting every wave, every movement, every tear, every breath.
So as I enter the celebration of this life, of being born, I honor each of us in the dance that has no end, nor no endpoint. We weave, expand, forget, remember, grow, love and live. As notes in one Cosmic song that echoes throughout eternity.


I love you.


Thank you from my heart for being here.
ūüíó

Helen assists in our embodiment as multi dimensional beings through sessions, energy healing, embodied light events and retreats. She currently lives in Mount Shasta, Northern California. Connect on her site or facebook.

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To know One Self as Divine Love

Love cannot know itself without the gaze of another, so it birthed Universes and exploded suns. 

It dappled stars in the blackness and cried oceans.

It sighed and breathed and sound was born. 

The dance is infinite.

This we are. 

Helen Quail
photography by Eyoalha Baker

This Mercury retrograde in Leo and Cancer has proved to be a real gem in readjusting how we present our inner Selves to the outside world. Sure it has also brought tech breakdowns and challenges (!) but most signficantly, the experience of this ride has been how it supports overcoming the fear of expressing our true feeling and desires and ending compromise and playing small. Through this there are tangible frequencies and templates of freedom and birth coming online in the last week or so. In these weeks, there has been a stepping out in whole new levels, with deeper alignment with authentic essence .

I was the girl who would hide at school, panicking at being asked to read aloud – to be heard, to be seen. What self esteem I had was based on two things – being very bright and academically successful and being told I was pretty (which I didn’t believe).

In the late twenties, devastating illness decimated those intellectual skills and and health and strength. I could not walk and often relied on the care from my new husband. This was the biggest gateway in my soul awakening and this journey has woven and cycled over the past twenty years. Early on, there was a seeing and knowing with deep clarity of visions of the “future self”, standing before a large hall of people, listening to my words. Six years ago, a step in that vision manifested when I stood before one hundred and fifty people leading a group meditation and healing.

Yet the pull of the egoic self – to stay small, to hide – continues. After several years stepping back from external work, the lifelong patterns of diminishment still arise. So the invitation to be a speaker on a conscious telesummit became one where I had two choices – to follow fear or to dare greatly – in the words of Brene Brown. The key is WHO is choosing. What aspect of our Being are we following? Was my soul quaking? Fearing the worst? No – so the choice becomes clearer. There was a deeper place present, not leaving, not abandoning. And this was what was chosen. No matter what.

So STAYING with what arises – not making any of it wrong, not getting entangled in the stories; not identifying with it; just letting it be met, loved and present – there is a natural, inevitable return to wholeness and peace. Calm, acceptance and joy at following what is true. And after the event, what a celebration! Of LIFE. Choosing to be alive; to live as Love and dissolve another layer of the self limiting programming.

Over this same period, I had my first professional photos taken in the most delightful way with the extraordinary Eyoalha Baker as the sun rose in the magical forest near Mount Shasta. You can see one above and on my site. And what a joyous and natural experience it was to play and dance with the light energies and beings.

The inner voices do not disappear, may never do, as long as this One is in a body-mind, but the journey is of understanding who is speaking. Listening, loving and bringing all home. This is a choice we truly make each moment. Each time we meet another’s gaze. Each word that comes.

My prayer is that we learn to listen, more than ever, to the quiet, to the bottomless. This is where the dance is, the movement, the stillness; the joy and the grief. I see you in your doubts, your trembling, your aloneness and self loathing. And I see you in your absolute magnificence, your infinite compassion and vast Love. They are not separate. It truly is in the BEING HERE for the really uncomfortable arisings that more light can land.

I love you in this. I know You.

Helen loves to meet in the Truth of who we are, opening to the highest movement and energies to support our wholeness, embodiment and evolution. This can be one to one, in groups, retreats or online circles. Find out more and you are welcome to connect on social media.

Choice point

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We are in the Dark Moon, midway in a truly epic gateway (15 – 17 March) and approaching Spring equinox, a time of great transformation; of coming into balance; of opening more than ever before to the Divine light which returns through the portal of the dark times.

The shift yesterday was very palpable, embracing us in new levels of Cosmic light. Today there is the opportunity to offer up that which no longer serves. We are called to deeper and deeper levels of mastery in meeting what is in or through our bodies and forms. It is a time of great collective release Рjust look at the passion and power of the young people leading the way on societal change and gun laws in USA .

It is also suggested this is the completion of a 6 year cycle into our wholeness. So you may be witnessing emotions, stories, pain physical, emotional or spiritual rolling through your inner landscape, much of it far more ancient than your life here on this planet.

We are so lovingly invited not to dampen down or push away anything. Nothing is unacceptable. Give every voice full space with full and unattached Presence. And bring the openness of our hearts to it all. Release any investment in blame or judgement of any other- including our own self. We feel what we feel.

And then …in the graciousness of Love and time and Presence we can truly choose truth, our deepest, purest truth. Choose wisely and release all the way. And each moment, all through our daily life, we breathe and drop into this again. Let our choice be as conscious as it can be, right now and setting the template for this now and for the coming half year cycle.
We get to choose. We get to create.
And best of all, we get to be together in this wild ride.

So much love.

Helen serves Love though one to one meetings, global gatherings; light activations and writing. Find out more on her site and connect on facebook.

Authentic Being

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Mount Shasta in early Spring

Authenticity is more and more at the core of what is thirsted for Рin every aspect of this One and all it encounters. As the human collective stumbles through more gateways of activation Рastrologically, deep cleansing in Gaia and political tensions Р the dances of the Cosmos are never far from awareness. Yet, as we open to the limitlessness of our true nature as timeless and multi dimensional Beings, our purpose right now, in human form is to bring All into embodiment, in this Now.

When heart and mind blast open through the veils of illusion and we awaken to Truth, there are infinite paths which can call to our passion. There can be a tremendous long-overlooked thirst revealed which demands to be met, yet holds many false avenues for a soul that may be still immature and ungrounded in the Being. The person(a) can still so easily take charge, simply clothed in apparently more appealing garments. For many of us there may be a period of months or many years where our lust for all things “spiritual” may become all consuming. This can simply shape to be another escape from reality itself; from the bliss and agony of tasting, of knowing, Truth. Further, it is so very easy to be pulled into an idea of being more evolved/spiritual/awake than family/friends/neighbour/ the bus driver and this is one of the sticky and subtle ways ego simply morphs. To the extent that we identify with ANY role and give that any value, we are invested in egoic self.

Whether we create circumstances of misery and tragedy or of abundance, we are continually emanating in tandem with the formless That which evolves All. There is omnipresent wordless communion. Nothing is unseen. Not our darkest thoughts, most shamed places. Nor our kindest actions. We exist in the holograph of the multiverse, continually vibrating between formless and form. Life is watching, breathing, stretching and simultaneously just IS.

One of the ironies of Life as a human is that we believe what we believe, in that moment! Whatever our state of consciousness, that is our “reality”. Until we know different. And it is those very thoughtforms that create what we experience before us. Each story that we crack through drops us in greater unknowingness. And the more whole-souled our surrender to the Infinite the greater the dissolution of what we have recognised as “life”. Everything that is not reality must die, again and again.

We must move through many layers of purification and initiation in order to strip away the personal, the distorted and the false emotion to even begin to taste Truth. And yet, and yet…it was always Here. It is always available. It never left. We just placed awareness elsewhere.

As we taste the Truth of Being, indescribable, inexpressible consciousness, ANYTHING that puts language or form to that is immediately a limitation. No matter how poetic or magnificent. It still has mind and therefore concept. Rather than Is. The deepest passion running through all great artistic endeavour could be said to be this call to express the inexpressible through creative energy.

“Whatever you have understood you are not. Spit it all out. Whatever you understand is not the truth. Throw it overboard. Do not try to catch hold of any concepts and cling to them. Don’t employ any words, but look at yourself as you are.¬†Throw away every thought, every experience, everything that happens after the consciousness, the beingness comes…

Before the beingness was there, look at that, be in that state. Do not get lost in words and thoughts and ideas. Do not crave for mind knowledge and concepts in the name of spirituality.¬†Anything that is seen and interpreted by the mind is only an appearance in consciousness, and, therefore, cannot be true. “ Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj.

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Love is everywhere

Our truest compass lies in the silence, with the awakening Divine heart. This is not the emotional heart but the Sacred Heart , the Christed centre of Love that resides in every Being. And this Heart calls forth and guides both the purification of mind and the essential opening and landing in the belly. Spiritual evolution is not about becoming more complex but actually about profound simplifying.  As the beating heart, we expand into the Infinite that IS, then breathe All That Is into and through this form, through Presence, creating, word and deed.

Each pathway of remembering and unforming-in-form is unique, with both jewels and pitfalls. No other can judge or appreciate how the unrepeatable expression of essence in form that is each One is called to wholeness and to the evolution of All. Is the butterfly that takes longer to hatch from the chrysalis any more or less than its fellow butterflies? Any more or less deserving of existing as a perfect expression of the Divine than a human, a waterfall, a star?

My heart and soul show me that the REAL core of coming to this particular planet lies in embodying on earth; not to transcend, but to awaken and bring every molecule of awakened Presence into body and action. The prevalent models of spirituality have long been patriarchal and the predominant model is one of transcendence, where we are called UP and OUT of our bodies and this earth realm. As the Divine Feminine returns to a freshly evolved balance, we can awaken to limitless Being AND be fully feeling, grounded and bloodied intuitive and sensory Beings with an umbilical cord to the pulse of Gaia and the Cosmos and our third eye firmly pressed to the Creator.

We practice not flinching to the agony but melting into it. No different than dissolving into the bliss. All of it is in our cells, our DNA, our non physical essence. We did not incarnate to BE anything, nor to become. We Are This. And That is part of the great Cosmic joke. We have nothing to prove, nor earn. Nothing to redeem. Nothing is real. And everything Is. Let us turn our nakedness to the skies and lay it upon the moist earth. All Is.

Helen serves consciousness however it calls. This may take the form of gatherings or retreats globally often at powerful Sacred locations; one to one sessions; groups and teaching; light transmissions; writing and being a mother and human on the planet. Please explore her site where you book a session and can sign up for very occasional mailings. You are also very welcome to connect on facebook.