Tag Archives: spirit

The innocence of gratitude

Mist over the Pacific Ocean, Northern California

I am welcoming the undercurrent of gratitude that has been a theme of recent weeks and, approaching my family’s first Thanksgiving celebration in USA, it feels especially timely to share some gentle reflections on this theme. California is moving through a very turbulent episode with wildfires devastating hundreds of thousands of acres, claiming land, lives and homes alike.  The US political system is more evidently in need of foundational overall than ever.

So it is exactly here,  and now where we can choose gratitude. Not for a second as a numbing or bypassing of feelings of grief, rage, loss or whatever may be moving through our system. All are welcome in ample spaciousness. Not at some future point when the world looks more in harmony; when our lives meet our expectations. But to excavate and feed gratitude as the ocean that lies beneath everything. It is our deeper and consistent “Yes!” to Spirit, to Truth, to the lessons that wake us from the sleepwalk and call us to LIVE in nothing less than full integrity.

Gratitude is a quality of the flow and alignment that is always present beneath the cementing of conditioning. Our true nature is one of Love, profound contentment, at-one-ment and appreciation. Not “because” of any “thing”. Love is not conditional. Our true nature is not conditional. Appreciation just is.

Western contemporary society is rigorously structured to defend and remove us from this state. Gratitude – if we feel it – in our over stimulated, materialistic driven modern world, is inexorably entwined with things or achievements. With the illusion of doing and the one who is doing.

But we ARE. And Here there are only rivers and rivers of rightness and appreciation for the perfection of everything – whatever form that may take in manifestation.

There can though be no sidestepping, no shortcuts for what is arising. Let us witness the ebbs and flows of feelings and thoughts  – without thinking this is who we ARE. And given space we can return to deep and permeating peace, contentment and wonder at the brilliance and intelligence of the Mystery.

So practice is required. Just as many of us find a nourishing foundation in meditation practice and our sadhana, practising gratitude on a consistent basis in our day and our life is another pointer home.

Gratitude is the gatekeeper from judgement or criticism of another being or of circumstance walking us into alignment with the holy wisdom of Life itself.

In noticing that sadness and grief float gently around where an “other ” cannot be present, meet, or feel us, gratitude flows forth in realising what is actually occurring is a further dying of this one’s attachment to identification. There is no person here to hold expectations of any other “person”. Just Beings, playing in form. The temporary movement of grief is welcomed. The greater movement into freedom is welcomed.

Let us practice in meaningful ways dropping into this aspect of true nature. Not only when things are going well in the eyes of the person(ality) but recognising that every experience, every interaction and every stripping away is a Divine messenger, a holy ally created by our own Selves to illuminate the light of Truth.

Helen meets in one to one sessions globally to facilitate wholeness. Please explore her site for a deeper taste and to book an appointment.
Sessions are offered in person and online from the Sacred transformative location of Mount Shasta, California, root chakra of the planet.
You are also welcome to connect on facebook. Helen will be offering a programme of group gatherings in 2019.
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Circles of transition

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Life has had me intensely in Her grip in past weeks. As for many of us, it seems. Huge transitions have been in play in all levels of my world, much of which remain quiet, integrating within.  And I have come to realise that this is equally the intensity that is moving in the collective as polarities in consciousness actually are pulled together to explode into what is true.

It has been a time of the circle. Completions and beginnings both interweave and overlay; one and the same. Timelines merge. The layers opening in recent times across so many levels have called for every bit of my energy and sometimes more.  On the third day of landing in California, dissolution happened in a vivid way. What seemed almost insanely intense, I slowly came to sense was not only (or even) personal. Of course, I had been under immense stress and pressure – relocating my family five thousand miles and much more – but I came to hear and feel of soul family equally cracking, weeping, dissolving, immobilised with exhaustion with striking power.  In this, I am grateful for the reminding that we are ever and always droplets in a moving, breathing, shifting ocean, each both drop and ocean, which brings some gentle comfort to the burning soul and aching body.

I find the invitation ever more vivid to be fully present to exactly what is – the raging; the holy fire; the inability to summon energy to function; the fury, despair, tenderness, quaking vulnerability, and always, always pulsing silently or loudly, – Love. Now I am beginning to drop tendrils into the Californian soil, to exhale, to soften into this more deeply. I feel my soul dropping deeper into my physicality, many aspects of my Self aligning. The threads that weave the invisible sanctuary in which Being can thrive are mysterious and many.

In these past days, the moon rose in her fullness over Mount Shasta. In Capricorn, she heralds a time of decision making; decisions that bring us closer to who we are and anchor our essence in the material plane in how we live and act. I have also very much been feeling the feminine flow of gentleness and softness, amplified by the Sacred mountain, even in her unrelenting transformative potency. The Mother sings her embrace of Sacred cadence simultaneously as we are lifted to make real life-directing decisions and to act upon them. The balance of the masculine and feminine feels more rooted in life than ever before.

I am but a “newcomer” in this life to living in the embrace of the mountain, with aeons of learning to rediscover and forge anew. In this apprenticing, I observe in one day the movements between softest Grace and fierce fire. Opening up all the way to exactly what is showing up here and now, however discomfiting, opens us – parts of us we know well – to devastation. What feels like devastation can open in a breath. And what remains? What is beneath and around; caressing, whispering and wrapping its unyielding arms around all? The more fully one can BE right here, – without restriction, without the cloud of story, – the torrent of the Cosmos can wash away more stones, more dust, more veils of attachment to identity or belief.

What is left, is Life itself, without interpretation and the film of understanding.  Indescribable, indefinable beauty.  Direct. Alive. Without limit.

Dying and being reborn we are. Infinitely.

Helen offers one to one sessions globally. Explore more and book at www.helenquail.com or facebook. The next cycle of events will come to fruition and be posted on her site in due course.

 

 

Mother of all

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Divine Mother,

Mother of all form

Blessed be your expression through every mother on this planet. Every human being in form has been birthed from a mother, whether we have never known their form or however our relationship has unfolded.

May the infinite bonds of loving nurturing be healed and strengthened in the heart and cells of every Being. May both mother and father come in to wholeness in loving nurturing protection.

I offer infinite gratitude to my mother in this life, I honour your strength, sacrifices, love and kindness;
to each of my five children who are my greatest, fiercest teachers; to the biological mother of my Ethiopian daughter – I bow to you and thank you for the honour of being guardian of this soul ~ our Hearts are One;
to the mother who helped caretake my oldest daughter since she was six years old, an angel who chose to serve by taking a form that requires lifelong care;
to my grandmothers and their grandmothers, the generations upon generations of wisdom keepers, I bow.

I am feeling all the Sisters who inspire me; whom I love; who change the world and beyond; whom I have held close and those I have never met in the flesh but who reside deep in my heart. Whether you see these words or not, we feel each other.
 
I think of all the women whose daily lives are a struggle in grinding poverty, feeding and caring for children, holding families and communities together under the most testing of circumstances. I feel the young warrioresses roaring against the machine, eyes unwavering from truth. I feel the grandmothers steeped in wisdom sitting on the earth listening and singing their prayers. I feel the mountains and stars and oceans dancing with us.
Mothers, daughters, sisters, lovers. Goddesses, maidens, crones. We all chose to be part of this spectacular exploration here on planet earth.
 
To all the brave, beautiful, fierce and tender women that hold and create Life – in our wombs, through our hands and our hearts, I bow to you. We are interwoven across and through everything.
Love everyone, anyway, as much as possible. Love wholly, completely and fearlessly, in the sweet short precious moments we are privileged to share with one another. 
This is what Life is, what permeates everything, whether we believe we are alone or have beloveds we can pull close and caress. This is the fire and air that fills us.
Be bold and tender; fierce and utterly vulnerable; be You; shakti soaked, earth shaking; deep, dark and blinding light; unafraid of our vastness. Celebrating Her presence in us all.

Creating new paradigms around mothering is at the heart of my soul’s mission. As this touches every being on this planet, it is a path that demands all and that brings forth the most ancient patterns.

Each day – not just “Mother’s Day”, may we pause in our breath, in our hearts, inviting the full expression of the Divine Feminine to move through our beings and into Gaia, her grids of light and beyond. May She do so in balance and union with the all encompassing Loving Presence of Divine Father.

And so it is.
And so it shall be.

 

Helen offers herself in service to Life through one to one meetings, group gatherings, global events and activations. Connect at facebook or her site.

Authentic Being

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Mount Shasta in early Spring

Authenticity is more and more at the core of what is thirsted for – in every aspect of this One and all it encounters. As the human collective stumbles through more gateways of activation – astrologically, deep cleansing in Gaia and political tensions –  the dances of the Cosmos are never far from awareness. Yet, as we open to the limitlessness of our true nature as timeless and multi dimensional Beings, our purpose right now, in human form is to bring All into embodiment, in this Now.

When heart and mind blast open through the veils of illusion and we awaken to Truth, there are infinite paths which can call to our passion. There can be a tremendous long-overlooked thirst revealed which demands to be met, yet holds many false avenues for a soul that may be still immature and ungrounded in the Being. The person(a) can still so easily take charge, simply clothed in apparently more appealing garments. For many of us there may be a period of months or many years where our lust for all things “spiritual” may become all consuming. This can simply shape to be another escape from reality itself; from the bliss and agony of tasting, of knowing, Truth. Further, it is so very easy to be pulled into an idea of being more evolved/spiritual/awake than family/friends/neighbour/ the bus driver and this is one of the sticky and subtle ways ego simply morphs. To the extent that we identify with ANY role and give that any value, we are invested in egoic self.

Whether we create circumstances of misery and tragedy or of abundance, we are continually emanating in tandem with the formless That which evolves All. There is omnipresent wordless communion. Nothing is unseen. Not our darkest thoughts, most shamed places. Nor our kindest actions. We exist in the holograph of the multiverse, continually vibrating between formless and form. Life is watching, breathing, stretching and simultaneously just IS.

One of the ironies of Life as a human is that we believe what we believe, in that moment! Whatever our state of consciousness, that is our “reality”. Until we know different. And it is those very thoughtforms that create what we experience before us. Each story that we crack through drops us in greater unknowingness. And the more whole-souled our surrender to the Infinite the greater the dissolution of what we have recognised as “life”. Everything that is not reality must die, again and again.

We must move through many layers of purification and initiation in order to strip away the personal, the distorted and the false emotion to even begin to taste Truth. And yet, and yet…it was always Here. It is always available. It never left. We just placed awareness elsewhere.

As we taste the Truth of Being, indescribable, inexpressible consciousness, ANYTHING that puts language or form to that is immediately a limitation. No matter how poetic or magnificent. It still has mind and therefore concept. Rather than Is. The deepest passion running through all great artistic endeavour could be said to be this call to express the inexpressible through creative energy.

“Whatever you have understood you are not. Spit it all out. Whatever you understand is not the truth. Throw it overboard. Do not try to catch hold of any concepts and cling to them. Don’t employ any words, but look at yourself as you are. Throw away every thought, every experience, everything that happens after the consciousness, the beingness comes…

Before the beingness was there, look at that, be in that state. Do not get lost in words and thoughts and ideas. Do not crave for mind knowledge and concepts in the name of spirituality. Anything that is seen and interpreted by the mind is only an appearance in consciousness, and, therefore, cannot be true. “ Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj.

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Love is everywhere

Our truest compass lies in the silence, with the awakening Divine heart. This is not the emotional heart but the Sacred Heart , the Christed centre of Love that resides in every Being. And this Heart calls forth and guides both the purification of mind and the essential opening and landing in the belly. Spiritual evolution is not about becoming more complex but actually about profound simplifying.  As the beating heart, we expand into the Infinite that IS, then breathe All That Is into and through this form, through Presence, creating, word and deed.

Each pathway of remembering and unforming-in-form is unique, with both jewels and pitfalls. No other can judge or appreciate how the unrepeatable expression of essence in form that is each One is called to wholeness and to the evolution of All. Is the butterfly that takes longer to hatch from the chrysalis any more or less than its fellow butterflies? Any more or less deserving of existing as a perfect expression of the Divine than a human, a waterfall, a star?

My heart and soul show me that the REAL core of coming to this particular planet lies in embodying on earth; not to transcend, but to awaken and bring every molecule of awakened Presence into body and action. The prevalent models of spirituality have long been patriarchal and the predominant model is one of transcendence, where we are called UP and OUT of our bodies and this earth realm. As the Divine Feminine returns to a freshly evolved balance, we can awaken to limitless Being AND be fully feeling, grounded and bloodied intuitive and sensory Beings with an umbilical cord to the pulse of Gaia and the Cosmos and our third eye firmly pressed to the Creator.

We practice not flinching to the agony but melting into it. No different than dissolving into the bliss. All of it is in our cells, our DNA, our non physical essence. We did not incarnate to BE anything, nor to become. We Are This. And That is part of the great Cosmic joke. We have nothing to prove, nor earn. Nothing to redeem. Nothing is real. And everything Is. Let us turn our nakedness to the skies and lay it upon the moist earth. All Is.

Helen serves consciousness however it calls. This may take the form of gatherings or retreats globally often at powerful Sacred locations; one to one sessions; groups and teaching; light transmissions; writing and being a mother and human on the planet. Please explore her site where you book a session and can sign up for very occasional mailings. You are also very welcome to connect on facebook.

 

 

Mother of Mine

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Mother of Mine

Mother of all

You’ve tended us so carefully

So we don’t fall.

Caught us and loved us

and held us so tight

When the fears and the darkness loom in the night.

 

Mother of mine

both human and Divine,

always so humble, giving and kind,

You gave so many years to us all.

So many hours,

so many tears

were wiped away by the hand that knows only Love.

 

Mother of mine,

I am so grateful you are here

and even in death you chose well and clear.

So we have these moments, these hours, these days

to thank you and love you for teaching your ways.

 

Ways based on faith in the guiding Love of the Divine

on serving and giving with no thought of self.

Your strength, majestic as a mountain,

your grace like a billowing leaf

you inspire each of us

to reach for the Truth

 

Mother of Mine,

Beloved Divine

in your human-ness you are loved and cared for

till your last breath becomes one

with the great Cosmic breath.

A pulse that never ends

and will reverberate through my blood for ever.

 

Mother of Mine.

divine-mother

 

Dedicated to my mother, Mary on her 77th birthday today.

 

Helen serves consciousness as called. The forms include energy healing, Presence, transmissions, gatherings and writings. She is honoured to connect through facebook or her site, where you can also sign up for very occasional mailings on her schedule and offerings.

Falling into Love, I rise.

FB_IMG_1472852439400Falling into love, I rise.

Dropping  away the layers, I fall, cleansed, naked, revealed.

This love flows through me,

not “mine” to retain

nor “yours” to give,

but in our purification

and our dedication,

both,

we are called to the crucible

And to BE the crucible,

Through our union.

 

A melding of alchemies

that sparks conceptions

and evolution .

 

There is a power that ripples across the Cosmos,

emanating from the belly of Mother

and the breath of Father.

 

In declaring a whole souled “Yes!” to the Divine Power,

Grace may reveal infinitely .

She fills my chest with countless galaxies; my eyes with brilliant stars.

My skin is enlivened with the dust of God, my blood richer with the fire of Love.

It is done. It is.

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Helen serves consciousness. This appears through one to one consultations, global gatherings, light transmissions and writings. It would be a delight to connect through her site, where you can also sign up for very occasional mailings or on Facebook.

To hold the truth of essence without abandoning Self

Loving couple holdind on the hands and sunset

The Heart of the Goddess loves infinitely. She nurtures. She embraces all in this love. A vital distinction in the path of the awakening feminine is to hold space and call forth the masculine BUT not at the expense of her own integrity, safety, growth, evolution and freedom.

This is a matter firstly of revealing and softening the conditioning and archetypes; of breaking through outdated distorting and suffocating structures and reclaiming the freedom of who we know ourselves to be. Humanity and all creation has witnessed many repeating cycles of power flowing between masculine and feminine expressions of Source in form. We are in an epoch where it is possible to reclaim the Divine feminine and – I believe deeply in my body – for this to be received and find balance with a healed and whole expression of the masculine energies of Divinity. This is a point in “time” arrived across millions of years of evolution. It is the gateway we exist in where Divine Union truly is possible.

And it is a matter of LOVE. In our deep abiding love, especially as women, we can give so much, care so much. One of the first lessons showing up for any who enter a path of spiritual learning and growth is that of loving oneself. The cliché that we can only love others to the extent that we love ourself is very true. But many of us have received models of pouring our love outwards to others without an even greater in-pouring inwards – that seems to function to a certain degree – and is certainly the accepted “norm” in the world around us. And this can continue in the spiritual world as we open our heart and become more loving. What we find is that the deeper we go – the more we evolve – the more we are also called BACK. Back in and down to love more and more our OWN Self.

What we are relearning is that the deepest core expression and celebration of love lies in our own Being and loving our own heart. In all its crackedness, bitterness, shadowy places. In all its glory and magnificence. Its’ fury, its’ power, its’ tenderness. Its’ scars and tender places.Because we are experiencing love as the higher dimensional energy that it is, loving the 3d heart and all expressions of human-ness from and as the infinite one love.

Love is not sugar coated and fluffy but fierce Grace that flinches from nothing, holds nothing sacrosanct – no belief, no relationship, no behaviour. It calls us out again and again, with a compassion and laser focus that has no equal. Turn to me. Turn to me and do not turn away. Bring all of you.

So we are asked to look at again at all the places that have learned to love and be loved, to give and receive. And to stand naked ready to meet all those we do not know.

The more deeply and fiercely we liberate our essence as Love, we offer liberation to the unseen and unknown parts of our being. The wounded places that have remained in our subconscious until such a point that the love present calls them forth. Calls them forth AS love. As perfect expressions of the Divine speaking to the Divine. And we can find a place in us to truly, deeply welcome these limping, spitting, bleeding parts. We commit to not turning away in shame or judgement but stepping towards, embracing with pure love. With gratitude. Again and again.

The feminine collective consciousness is actively bringing to light the oldest of patterns and imbalances expressed through the (distorted) masculine. As awakening beings – especially for women – longing to return to the deepest knowing and experience of the Love that we are, we have commonly been conditioned to lose our identity, independence – emotional or financial – in romantic partnerships or marriage. In this now, we have the opportunity to completely redefine true healthy relationship – founded on whole and loving relationship with our own self  and mirrored in a much more healthy and rigorous balance with our Beloved partner.

So can we stand in presence and in our hearts, holding the knowing of who we are, and the mirror of Divine presence to the “other ” before us, and not drop back into the old, old patterns of giving everything for this love? We are asked to hold our own integrity above all else. This arises not only from getting clear on our core moral values and the meaning we ascribe to this life experience but from a deep and unconditional presence of love. For our self and for who Life has placed before us. Right now. And this is not emotional love, romantic love nor restricted by mental concepts of love.

Love – like “enlightenment” or the Divine – is by its very nature limitlessness.

At the heart is our deep self care. We are learning to create a sanctuary that is impenetrable by anything that is not Love.  One that holds both inner and outer being in safety, deep love and strength at all levels. To wrap safety around our tissues and fields that does not carry even the feintest trace of restriction or repression, that has no connection with fear; nor seeking security or control; that is rooted and grounded utterly in trust in Source itself. This is the safety we are held in as women (and men). If we choose it.

So we are tested and given the practice to walk with again and again. Can I hold this being in love yet not compromise my own light? Can I love myself deeply and whoever is before me as Love in form, yet not compromise the honouring of either of our essences?

As expressions of the Divine feminine can we continue to shine a beacon of light; radiate limitless love with neither expectation that the masculine will do or be “anything” nor hooking ourselves into any “outcome”? Can we do this yet know when to walk away at physical an emotional level for our own wholeness (and so theirs)?

Can I hold the truth of this man’s essence, let him be where he is without abandoning him or myself?

This Beloveds is our invitation.

Helen is a love and light worker, serving consciousness. She offers writings, worldwide events, retreats and one to one sessions. If you are interested in knowing more, or in details of 2016 programmes please see her site, fb or sign up for an occasional newsletter.