Tag Archives: spirituality

Love’s call

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Let no one tell you who you are.
Let every wind, tree and bird show your deepest, vastest nature
beneath all the layers of skin,
hardened over years of pulling away from the inexorable vortex within;
the mirage of mirrors of clothing
and hats
and too-quick words
that lean us away from Love’s freefall,
into echoing despair.

Where is the pulse of your belly?
The ocean of your chest?
the Cosmos of your Sacred heart?
Oh let us free it all into wildness, together.

Let go into the infinite that has no definition,

only the tears of your cracking chest
the breath of your soul
that will pulse forever
like a beacon,
and a torch
calling always to truth.

 

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naked

baby

We move through life accumulating layers of clothing and weight; of personality; social identity; memories and past experiences that we hold as shaping who we are. In the surrender to awakening, we die to who we thought we were. This death occurs again and again; even as we see the grasp loosen, as we feel the spaciousness of True Self dancing through and around us as we move in the world, there are many, many deaths to come. We are actually returning to the nakedness with which we entered, wide-eyed, naked, non-identified. ( I wonder, how much of parental perception infiltrates the placenta? What is the interaction between the consciousness of the embryonic baby and the mother for instance? Fascinating to enquire)

Yet we become naked, stripped of defence mechanisms, behavioural patterns in which to hide; self-esteem built on achievement or status. There is the realisation that no-one is here. No “one”, only That. There are levels of witnessing that move more and more subtly to the Absolute perceiving itSelf.

In preparing for a first public event after an absence of two and a half years, it was fascinating to watch the patterns of the egoic self-doubt and worthlessness arise. Regardless of what had gone before, the mind desperately attempts to diminish. Awareness was held that this was necessary and welcome releasing, yet this did not make any of it less intense. And as it came closer and the commitment to showing up did not lessen, relief came in the joke of realizing (again) that there is no-one to show up; no-one to “do” anything”. There is only form, offering itself as a vehicle for the Divine; fulfilling some part of its calling. So nothing to identify with; not be attached to an outcome or even the experience. It is to say yes to the call and surrender utterly to Divine intelligence as to how that moves; what that looks, feels and tastes like.

The invitation is to be naked. No agenda. No investment. What it is essential is to be pure in our intention and heart. Then, whether things apparently go well or awry is actually meaningless. Each one of us that shows up serves the greater intelligence. There is full surrender.

In the vulnerability of being totally naked,  the only thing to fall back on and into is the Goddess, Life, Source. What joy and relief to let go, to surrender even more to Her. And in the joyousness and playfulness, All come, All is Here. We are indeed newborn, creating Universes with our breath, galaxies with our heart beat. Awakening occurs through each differentiated essence-in-form and through our unified intentions. Together we remember, we strip away, we love each other home in our hearts.

Come play and explore together. Helen is facilitating gatherings in the UK and USA and offers individual session work globally. Explore her site and facebook for more info and to subscribe for occasional updates.

The new balance – Accountability, Communication and The True Voice of the Feminine

 

 

1-namaste-robby-donaghey

Robby Donaghey – Namaste

 

 

There has been a swelling tide of unheard voices the past five months, now echoing across this blue planet. Women have spoken out, perhaps as never before in the his/her/story of humanity, against the socially acceptable and cultivated epidemic of diminishing and defining females through the abuse and distortion of sexual energy and power.#metoo. Men too have spoken who have also been victims of the misuse of sexual power, whether by either gender.

In some arenas, brave men have come forward and owned their transgressions, from subtle misjudgements to devastating actions.  I have also read women fiercely taking responsibility for their part in misusing sexual and emotional energy in relationships. This is not the space to dive deeply into this, other than to note that, in the circles I connect with globally, I have witnessed the conversation evolving to one of honouring the power of this voice and transparency and then moving to the next step – TOGETHER – of how male can support female; how the Sacredness of sexuality can be reclaimed by all beings, whatever gender or sexual orientation; how each sex can forgive the other, and her/himself. And most key of all, how the distortions inherent within each expression of Source – as predominantly “feminine” or “masculine”- beyond personal stories – can be more fully revealed, met in compassion and love and alchemised.

This wave has a mighty wake, moving through the entire collective, not only those in conscious reflection but the vast majority who are not. The key themes are

Accountability and Communication

leading to the third – Speaking up –

the voice of the True Feminine, clear, strong Loving, liberated and evolved to be the transmission of the Feminine Divine Herself.

I am not describing victim energy nor one of blame – not in its purest motivation and how I have experienced its rising. It is a very, very long suppressed expression from deep and vulnerable places and, in the courageousness and purity of this, is a genuine invitation for accountability. Note,  accountability does NOT have any trace of blame, shame or judgement. It is CLEAR, CLEAN and authentic. It is fully honest. This last point can be generally missed.

If we hold invitation and space for another being to be truly accountable, we are neither seeking to apportion blame on them; to hold onto anger, resentment or other emotions. Accountability is deep liberation for each party. The one owning their words or actions has the opportunity to integrate shadow aspects, to find compassion, forgiveness and greater love for one’s own self. The recipient may find it easier to rest in acceptance and possibly, in their own time then find their way too to forgiveness, compassion and some form of peace. These principles apply whether we are talking about a minor disagreement or horrific abuse. The scale of the suffering is the primary difference.

Accountability supports freer communication. I often see the flow of the infinity symbol (figure eight) in relation to so many aspects of Life. As so for communication, expressing and receiving, with natural pauses for integration and inner reflection. Meeting in the centre, the zero point. S.T.O.P. – Stop, think, observe, pause. ( Deepak Chopra).

And so, as we go deeper into this field, beyond blame; through the personal; through the gateway of embracing pain more wholly than before; through even more expansive Love, we engage in a “new” conversation with the Cosmos itself; a new sense of relationship that (perhaps) we are tentatively touching on. Re-membering wholeness.

This is the time for BALANCE of male and female energies. Our next evolutionary step as a species – or at least one of them – is founded on Divine Union – healing the split between the masculine and feminine.

“The true “twin flame” is a climactic turning point in Creation, a turning on the heel, a re-direction home. A liberation from bondage. A wild and surreal, ancient song that heals the entire Universe, right in the place that it’s heart was broken, so it could speak again.

Together, we can hold the earth and sky, and as guardians and ancient seeds we will fulfill the promise we made at the beginning of the world, and go home together, unified with the whole of Divine Creation with Love.” – Alison Nappi

Divine Union creates the pathway for the next upgrade in consciousness itself through this embodied quest. We can only do this in form. Here and now. And in relationship. And – given that aeons of wounding and distortion are releasing for transmutation – it is a path that demands every molecule of devotion in the most grounded ways. It requires great clear-sightedness if we are not to get blinded by the sea of unconscious patterning that is thrown, up nor find ourselves unwittingly replaying them.

“We want close relationship more than anything, and simultaneously we want nothing to do with it. The archaic fears of abandonment and engulfment circle in the psyche of the personal and the collective.” – Matt Licata

It requires a willingness to open the heart again and again in the face of the energy of betrayal, abandonment and separation that lay in the beginnings of this path. Not the very beginning, the point where this wound came to be.

My deep inner knowing is that it was before Lemuria and Mu. Before Yeshua and Magdalene – yet these times and Beings have been some of the points in space and time where some of this work has been done.  It was – most likely – at the first breath of differentiation into form and has been carried into and explored through every cycle of the evolution of consciousness. Aeons of work that have been preparing for what is now possible.

There have been many Sacred partnerships on Earth and elsewhere across time and space. Yet it is my sense-knowing that it is only in this now that the male-female aspects of Divinity can whole and evolve. We cannot know the numerous Cosmic factors why this is so,  yet the human experiment is at an unprecedented point where this has the potential for success.

The Christ essence is returning to Earth. Not as a man but in the Sacred spark within each being. And the Divine Feminine Christ is anchoring, heart by heart. She is Here. The two are of course not separate but two emanations of the One and in their embodiment, Divine Union has, now, the chalice to come forth.

Drop all illusions that Divine Union is any fairy tale love story.  Rather, it will cleave us to our core, shatter us into innumerable shards and rebuild us from the very stuff of Life itself. New and yet unknown. Never before birthed in form. We are the carriers, the forerunners that can lead the flowing wave; the charge of light upturning the citadels, burning the false Gods, courageously diving into the fire and darkness and thrusting the new earth through the Cosmic yoni into the luminous adoration of Ma. We are the Ones we have been waiting for.

Blessed be on our courageous hearts.

To be continued….

Helen serves the Infinite however called. She holds one to one consultations globally, in person or Skype. A programme of 2018 gatherings is in formation. Please connect via her site (currently being replaced) for further information, book a session or to sign up for occasional email updates. You are also welcome to connect on facebook.

Heart flow

surrender-in-flow

As I rest in heart-crushing sadness, it is the ancient sadness of witnessing – of FEELING – a fellow soul choose fear instead of love; limitation instead of infinity; illusion instead of truth. My heart truly breaks to feel the asleepness, the loss. It is akin to being behind a glass window trying to communicate to a prisoner. So very much that cannot be heard, understood or communicated.

I accept this Being as a form before me, no different to “I”, mirroring aspects of Source incarnate. I get it. So the sadness over “him” is sadness over all the places and lifetimes where my “I” chose to stay hidden in the false safety of the ego. Every where I can still do so. There is a particular poignancy as this is someone I have loved deeply, over many years. But if true love is about anything it is about letting be. Letting the Beloved be exactly who they are. No matter if our soul cries at what is possible but remains unopened. There is great beauty in the tenderness of acceptance.

And through it all I whisper internally, “I love you” ” I love you”. At the foundation of everything is always the Love. The knowing and remembrance that THIS is who we are, dancing in these masks and these body suits for moments, we are infinite and already perfect. Already born.

Still I cry for all Beings. That we may wake to the knowing of our true nature. To our absolute magnificence as creations of Love and as Divine Masters, adopting the mantle of the ever so human experience for a few breaths in time.

I cry for us all.

So that in the depths of this ocean I will gasp for the air of Truth ever more passionately. Ever more compassionately. And we will swim hand in hand to the vast open-ness of the surface.

One of the richest invitations of waking up while on this planet is learning how to be with those who walk in different worlds. How to be a bridge of love and light; to keep doors open whilst remaining deeply authentic to our truth and to live in full integrity. No “one” is better, worse or even separate – just expressions of different places in the Cosmic journey of evolution. It is a delicate and challenging skill and can come with a lot of heartache as we may have to walk away from many loved ones who choose the world they believe to be true.

This is just one level of the sadness. A sadness so soft and deep it fills the atmosphere and calls to my cells. This past week many of us have felt the strength of what is being released and transmuted in collective consciousness, supplemented by the force and effects of solar activity. Many of us have felt knocked out as our nervous systems adjust to the alchemy.

In my own being I am finding the next level of service in how my body and energy can transmute denser vibrations more organically – as innately as the flow of breath. And part of the expansiveness of that is refining the skill of staying unengaged in any story. I could choose any of a number to attach to; to ascribe either sadness or joy to. But that is not truth.

Essence just IS. Love just IS. Pain just IS.

So this deep sense of heart crushing sadness feels simultaneously like the contraction required to stimulate a greater burst into life, with renewed strength and power as the heart rebounds with more vitality, more capacity for all this Life IS. More blood can flow. More aliveness. And more rawness.

And I bow in gratitude – to the One before me whose personality chooses to stay in contracted ego, for He is the Divine and I love the essence before me; to my soul tribe who so courageously open to Love no matter what; who reach out and hold my hand and my heart in any moment: to my body for its tremendous capacity and courage to serve Life; to the Great Mystery, which is throwing up so much turmoil on our beloved planet right now so we can writhe and shake and stretch and grow into higher realities.

 

Helen serves the evolution of consciousness and anchoring of the Divine Feminine through many forms – one to one sessions globally; light transmissions; gatherings and events worldwide and humbly through writings and Presence. Please see more on her site , where you can sign up for very occasional mailings and do connect on facebook.

Cosmic Warriors of Light

cosmic-lovers

We walk together through the spaces between stars,

feet landing on fresh green shoots of grass and on scorched earth both.

Our hearts’ echoes are the drumbeat that we march to, calling us into formation,

laser sharp through the black space.

 

There is a vibration we know as intimately as an out breath

and in sensing it or hearing it in another form, our inner flame ignites.

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Art : Robby Donaghey ~ Becoming Love

Together we burn brighter and more fiercely, devouring all that is not true

and cleansing tracts of land far and great.

 

Warriors of Light, I sing to you, come forward.

It matters not if you are

limping,

weary,

confused.

It matters not that there is no map or pathway clear.

 

It matters only that you hear,

and, in the hearing, step,

placing body and being in service

to the Greatest Calling of All.

 

Emptied as the clear flute, through which Spirit may play,

the melody grows and dances through the skies,

whispering at more ears,

more hearts,

more souls.

“Come home.”

“Remember we are One.”

 

Whether head bowed over newborn babe,

ploughing fields,

constructing bricks and mortar

or walking barefoot on pilgrimage,

let the music dancing at your heart’s door enter and consume you.

 

We are called.

We are called.

Let us dance to the Divine melody of our Call.

 

For Alan.

 

Helen is in service to the evolution of consciousness and the anchoring of Divine frequencies. This occurs through direct personal healing sessions and consultations; gatherings, groups and retreats globally, light transmissions and writings. Please do connect on facebook or through her site where you can also sign up for very occasional mailings.

 

Loving and Fear

star-eyes

“What do I fear most in this life?” I ask my subconscious. The answer comes – it is the lie.

The lie that lays behind the half-truth, the closed eyes. The lie that closes doors rather than opening them.

What I fear most in this life is the lie that causes decay and rot. A fermenting of unspoken words. A half-light of awareness.

What I fear most is the dark that comes from this lie. I do not fear the pure dark; the blackness of night nor the void space that births stars. Rather I fear our turning away from it – light or dark. The veil we place over our eyes and ears when we turn from truth. The truth that is found in both the dark and the light as two expressions of the One.

I used to tremble at the weak spots in my psyche that whine for safety and sameness. I see now that I claim them, more and more with each day. And in my claiming I am loving them. Perhaps more true is that I may be afraid of my UNseeing of them. That is what gives me true discomfort. And yet I know that, the deeper and more unconditionally I love all places in self or “other”, all that has been hidden and shamed will gently reveal in Divine readiness. In truth I do not fear the asleep consciousness in us all. It is an essential foundation for our functioning.

What I fear most is the vastness of my light, the magnitude of Being. The astounding, incomprehensible power of Divine essence that can bring only the death of all that is false. But who is this “I” who feels the discomfort? It is but the small self. The social self, who clings to fragments of life rafts of identity.

There is a place that can show in my soul that worries that I will not have the courage when all is stripped away to stand bare, weeping, wounded and free from every label, every strip of identification. To stand in my infinite stature as the magnficent Being and ambassador of light that I am. And, as I remember, again and again, not to believe the story of the fear, I caress those places – whether in psyche or soul – with the softest balm of love, letting them be exactly as they are.

Will I hold this head clear, easy and strong? Or crumble to the earth in shame? Will I hold humility in my cells equally to the sovereignty and realization?

The “I” that is, was and always shall be knows no fear. For “I” am love. Of love. Inseparable, vast and impenetrable.

Fear is also the birthing of Universes from the belly of Source and Her curiosity to see life expand and evolve through the contrast of duality. It is the necessary mirror to the brilliance of Divine love. There can only be fear prevailing where we turn away from our own darkness. As lovingness fills our very DNA, deeper and deeper, the ocean holds and bathes every expression and shade of our Beingness. The deeper we are called, the free-er we can rise.

There is only fear where Love is not. Love can go to any place – if it is invited. Like the angels! But first there must be a call – spoken or unspoken. A deep – soul–deep – invitation that no matter what, above all, is love. A willingness to meet the fire and the heart-shattering tenderness both. To receive it into our deepest recesses, squirming at the alchemy with our pains. And to offer our human forms as vehicles and containers for infinite love.

blue-blast

What is it I fear most in this life, for nothing can kill me, I am eternal? Life is eternal. I am born and never die. Only forms change. And through each form, a myriad and multitude of galaxies of experience; of touches and tears; agony and joys.

When I return home to love there is no fear. As I breathe it in, Universal, unending and as vast as I can conceive and taste, fear is cradled and comforted as a newborn baby. All softens in unlimited tenderness. The hard edges of anxiety or terror are met with the waves of the ocean which washes them clean. Fear and love take hands and dance, laughing at the pure joy of innocence and the Divine design. It is the ocean of limitless love that carries the wave of panic. Softens it, meeting it until it dissolves in a billion bubbles, indistinguishable from any droplet in the sea.

And so our prayers for the waters are also our embracing of fears. The most ancient, primal and rudimentary of fears. I CAN survive. I CAN Live – and walk upon this blue green planet in strength and peace and harmony with my brothers and sisters.

I see you fear. I look on you with unflinching loving. I see the shadows that lurk in you. The unspoken ones. The buried ones. And I vow not to deny you nor turn in shame. You are the messenger of the Divine calling me closer, deeper.

In understanding your true essence and staying present with your gifts, I am born. And yet not born, for I always was. Always existing. Ever present as Love and Truth.

 

Helen Quail serves love through any many vehicles – direct consultations and healing sessions, in person or via Skype; gatherings, events and retreats globally; light transmissions and writing. You are so welcome to connect and find out more about her offerings via facebook or her site, where you can also sign up for very occasional mailings.

 

1111 Awakening through Life

holding-world

As I returned to my writing screen, it was 11.11 – a significant portal for the awakening frequencies of the Divine to be received and integrated by humanity. The 111 codes ask us to be utterly conscious of our dreams, our thoughts and our words and to ensure that our movements in the physical realms, whether word or action come from our highest expression and awareness of consciousness.

I always feel 111 and 11.11 related to new beginnings. For of course consciousness is the Creator, the beginning, the manifester. And simultaneously completely outwith any concept of time. The reality which is present in every breath is heightened – that we are given the chance to begin afresh. This, not in terms of denying exactly where we are and all the circumstances we have created to be at this precise point, but rather arising FROM every thought and action that has gone before. As every nutrient and day of gestation creates an entirely new Being in human form on the planet when a baby is born, so all our choices and seeming failures to act in the highest alignment create the perfect, optimum conditions for this deep birthing.

It is also now eight days since my mother passed from her human body.

And six since America voted for Donald Trump to be its president.

None of it unrelated.

One of the gifts of these last days at my mother’s bedside is the knowing which may previously have drifted into being more intellectual, that EVERYTHING in my experience, in my world, is interconnected. This has dropped right down into my belly. Into absolute knowing.

My mother’s transition and the profound experiences that took place towards it; the water protectors and protests at Standing Rock; uncomfortable tensions with my siblings; my deep soul love and alchemy with my partner; my children expressing challenging responses and behaviours; my ex husband not showing up fully as a father; a dear soul sister leaving the country; the political coup in Turkey and the American elections.

All of it.

Let me breathe this circle.  Sit with me here. In the centre. When we return to this still point, we feel our column of light anchoring both into Gaia’s heart and that of Source. We reclaim our infinite strength as Divine beings playing in this human movie for a few moments. From here, we can watch the dance of all that is playing out in these movies on the world stage and on the more “personal” stage of our private lives.

A tricky and essential distinction to navigate is that of witnessing and knowing this is all illusion yet not falling into spiritual bypassing. This is sold seductively in new age thinking and often can creep into us without our noticing. At the other end of the loop is getting caught in the drama of the collective and letting ourselves believe any of it is actually real. How to acknowledge and honour pain in any Being without losing sight and knowing of what is real? Can we remember that everything is created by Divine intelligence for the evolution of consciousness?

We – as embodiments of Divine Source are here as co-creators, with free will and living in form surrounded by the density of soul amnesia. This earth school journey is one to bring Divinity into form. To live it in our human-ness – our ability to FEEL intensely; to cry and dance and laugh and make love. What a magical, majestic and joyful play we are in!

Dancing this balance is an art form that requires practice till the moment our essence leaves this plane. We can never be complacent, for the cumulative weight of conditioning rains into our bones and cells each and every day. We never become immune to that but hopefully, with dedicated intention and practices, we learn to soften it, to understand it and – crucially – not to identify with it. Perhaps we may even learn to love the healthy ego structures that allow us to function as human and in community. And anything that shows up on our personal or global horizon as manifestations of that which wishes to be acknowledged and loved into harmony.

We are all in uncharted waters in these new lands. Four years on from the 2012 gateway, we have another especially heightened window through to 1.1.17 to receive and embody higher Divine frequencies. None of this can be done when our inner work and our shadow work is not addressed at ALL levels. All are equally essential. So in the face of political instability and extremes; natural “disasters” and personal experiences of loved ones choosing to leave earth or relationships dissolving, we do our work. We walk our talk.

We let go of the temptations to judge, to feel ever so subtly “right”, vindicated or superior. We accept that every being on this planet is an equal expression of the magnificence of the Divine. That is why we are required to practice our mastery through every moment of our day (and night). Use the tools that best nourish you – particular meditations; body practices; time in nature and KNOW that you are part of a soul tribe, whether you know them directly or not. We have our families of light – many on earth, many more on other stars and galaxies. Remember to sing to each other the song of our hearts. To radiate the light of our souls, thus lighting the way for all of us who find it hard to see through the shadows at times.

Let light shine upon every heart awakening us to our true nature.

And so it is.

Helen is in service to consciousness and has a particular role with the frequencies of the Cosmic Divine Feminine. Offerings come through direct consultations and personal sessions (in person or Skype globally); gatherings, events and retreats worldwide; light transmissions and writing. Please connect through facebook or her website, where you can also signup for very occasional mailings to stay informed.