Tag Archives: transformation

Freeing the coils of judgement

early morning sun at Ascension Rock, Mount Shasta

It is a deep journey to not make one’s own self wrong for experiencing the energy we call judgement. For then we simply loop into the never ending cycle of identification. Judging ourself for judging, or whatever else may be showing up – anger, despair, sorrow. With the movement to BE with the happening, deeper than simply witnessing or observing, there is a full Presence meeting of the arising. Not flinching from the full tasting of its colors. Yet, vitally, not following any thread of story. What if we simply are here for this movement, all the way, in all its discomfort? What if its nothing about any other, but about a piece of Source coming home?

Judgement – whether of another or oneself – is the same inner trap we can fall endlessly spiralling into, when we mistakenly identify with what is arising. Making a being wrong for whatever traits or blind spots show in unconsciousness, or that might be illuminated in the journey to wholeness, is such a strong programming of the egoic self. The goal – to keep us separate and small, identified.

It has been a core area of learning in this one for decades, since first facing the devastating impact of this energy relentlessly directed at all aspects of the self by the mind and ego. It was the primary aspect that came to awareness when health broke down completely. Internal judgement and the fruitless striving for some level of perfect were the starkest pointers to the inner disconnect. Through many, many waves of healing, self forgiveness and acceptance, a foundation of love has taken deeper and deeper hold. And this theme still arises, where the Self is not integrated AND because it is very alive in the collective. We are deeply programmed to feed separation through judging – better/worse; more/less; good/bad.

This aspect is a trademark of the ego. Once more, we are reminded that this is not “personal”. It will be felt intimately in the personal layers, but this topic is being heard alive amongst very evolved beings, and notably in womens’ conversations. It could be hypothesised that this is a trait more evident in the feminine shadow but that is a huge exploration in itself for another time. Its’ balance is boundless compassion and, vitally, the realisation that its arising does not mean anything about our true nature. That is, not to judge the judgement; not to identify with the identification.

Many on an awakening path of enquiry have taken on a belief that we cannot actually “be spiritual” if we are experiencing judgements, thoughts or feelings of anger and other emotions which have been marginalised and value laden as “negative”! What if the holy fire of anger is just that – a wave of Cosmic power tearing through our core, burning, releasing, freeing? Judgement can be an outplay of where we are still mistaken on who we are. Where there is still identification as a somebody, separate from another somebody. The unpurified ego seeks a false sense of comfort in “better than” or “worse than”. Its precisely the same energy that is founded in separate self.

When this response shows, there may potentially be things to clear or express with another being that are valuable in our own anchoring and growth . And it is healthy to discern where the other is even available for this exploration. But our first and last work is meeting the judgement inside and being scrupulously clear about where we are moving and speaking from. Can we stay without beating oneself up about it? Not judging the judgement; but recognising it as a strong thread that moves through for reuniting. We can further learn to be vigilant for the leaning into making the other wrong in even the subtlest ways, in implying that a difficulty is about them. It is always, always, about what is ready to come home through the vehicle of this consciousness, this essence, this soul.

So if we feel another is not in their heart, and it bothers us, let us turn inward. Where am I not in my heart? Where is there fear or judgement about this belief? Is there a pull to more ways to self diminish and loathe, cloaked in spiritual concepts? Is there a movement to make anything mean something about the innate nature of myself or another? Where there is still a charge, there is inner work to be done. To be present to the ripple or the crashing wave. To listen, look, breathe. Not know anything other than this now, right here in the eye of the storm.

As we resist following the impulse to complain or play victim, we deliver ourself more into authentic and full responsibility for our choices and life. We say a Greater yes to the perfection of the design. Where another has not behaved in an honoring way, it calls us to stand in our truth, to value what we are and move from our most authentic Self, whether or not this is reflected externally. When we feel resentful about not being valued, how are we valuing ourself? How do we speak up for what matters? Hold boundaries? Value our own energy? Victim patterning has run deep in the wounded feminine and will rise again and again until She is clear and anchored in Her magnificence and in uwavering accountability for Her choices, movements and silences. Her voice is called forth but it the voice of the sword of Truth, as well as the Heart of Love, so it must be purified, clear.

Where we feel marginalised, how are we diminishing ourself? There is a very old and familiar thread of being “the outsider”, excluded from the tribe and another version of the”less than” motif of ego. It can also be a vulnerable expression of one of the core challenges of being a starseed in a human body. Many of us are achingly familiar with this particular pain of feeling so different, so out of place in a human world that has largely forgotten what we are as Cosmic beings. In meeting this ache, we can be brought again, by Love, to step up and out, more than ever, certainly in new ways, integrating and embracing all that it is to be a multi dimensional being in a body on earth.

This piece is huge, as many are stepping up and being seen in whole new ways, inevitably meeting our edges, where the little one equally wishes to hide in invisibility. What we are cannot be swayed by another’s praise or criticism; open arms or cold shoulder. The egoic self and heart may tremble momentarily, or longer, but the Self lands deeper in just Being. If we can accept another in their character “flaws” and blindness and still know them as Divine, then we are brought more profoundly to this same meeting in and of our own self. And perhaps this is the greatest calling – with all of what we are in these human body-minds; exactly as we are right now, we are God in form. We are re learning what is real and true through every aspect of living these lives. Nothing is separate. Nothing is unwelcome.

Go well Beloveds.

Helen works one on one as an embodied awakening guide and intuitive multi dimensional healer and co creates in events in Mount Shasta,throughout California and internationally. She is also a meditation, healing and yoga teacher, writer, and tribe mother, with a poet’s heart and evolutionary’s soul – amongst other things! You are so welcome to explore and find out more on her site, and facebook . Keep Being You.


Love in Action


This is the age of the heart of surrender. As we look around and witness the extremes playing out on Earth that can seem so far from truth. What we are witnessing is the final and desperate writhings of old patterns thrown up to surface so that they can dissolve. The great Cosmic soup coming to simmer and the dissonant lower vibrations floating up so they can evaporate back in to the oneness.

We also incarnated on this planet at a time when Divine Union is possible as never before. Union within between our highest Divine light and the depths of our shadows; between our masculine and feminine aspects – Shiva and Shakti; between inner and outer worlds and consciousness; between earth and Source.

The old paradigm and distortions of the masculine are based on driven, ego based action with no heart. The distorted feminine templates base in unconscious acting out of emotion, manipulation, hysteria. Our wholeness is safe, strong and centred in presence married with a wide open heart and flowing intuitive senses.

So love in action, union in expression can be found in a simple yet profound approach to every moment, to Love. Divine timing and inspired action.

This balance is ever more subtle.

Many beings are awakening in consciousness. Some rapidly, some incrementally over many years. But the falsity of the emptiness, the illusions are becoming more impossible to ignore for millions.

At some point we have to go through the initiations of the heart which can be brutal and leave our ego shredded in an ocean of not knowing . And what beauty there is in this! And the surrender can only deepen and deepen. Finding edges and cloaked limitations and surrendering again.

The path of the heart demands everything –  total and utter surrender.

BUT it also asks for action. Decisive, concerted, fearless action.

Personally I feel my passion and dedication and when something shows up strongly in my knowing and guidance I say yes. And there is an impetus to move, act and honour that knowing. Yet there is a practice as we become more and more discerning; as trust deepens of really feeling deeper. Is action called for NOW? Or is my invitation to really rest in presence, nurture my vibration; be.

If I am not acting is it through denial or fear? What is moving me? So the invitation is to feel deeper and to trust deeper. In this, whatever we are feeling we know we are safe and loved to move or not move – to honour whatever is showing up.

Where this has been illuminated for me very recently is in my calling to my Beloved in form. Many souls are walking a path of service and expansion through (re) union with Beloveds – whether defined as soul mates, twin flames or other. I have known and more importantly felt deeply that this is a key in my path and felt his presence coming for five years. Along the way I have been given the perfect practices to rip off my blindness, call forth unseen and loved places into the core of my Heart and Being and learn more about my own feminine- masculine balance.

And I came to a place or real peace, surrender and trust. No attachment. I came home to myself as Beloved. And from there to an even deeper trusting that life will take care of all which of course it will.

In that surrender, and trust in the Divine, another level of realization has sparked.  Of what Love in action can really mean.

Two analogies come to mind. The joke about the man who goes to the temple every day and prays to win the lottery. Again and again. After many weeks, he falls to his knees in despair. “Why oh Lord did you not answer my prayers?” And God responds, “I did. You didn’t buy a ticket.”

If you lost your job tomorrow, and have a home and children to support, would you go home lie on a sofa and say,  “God will manifest the perfect career and abundance” and do nothing? We can hold and vibrate that knowing and intention absolutely – but we would combine this with action. Sending out cvs, networking, letting people know what we are looking for and applying for jobs. The old paradigm was built on the second part of that equation- of action – but arising solely from the mind and ego. Not birthed deeply from surrender and trust in the Divine perfection of whatever Life brings.

So with the vibrational template and intention in place, we ARE Love in action.

And so I realised I also needed to combine knowing , trust and surrender and deep internal work with action. Thousands of us have found each other through the internet  – as soul family and friends and also lovers and life partners. It calls for a certain degree of vulnerability in declaring publicly – “I am ready and looking for my Beloved.” And it calls for rigour to scrupulously ensure our fields and intention are as clear as possible. That we are already in the key relationship with ourSelf as Beloved. With the One in form. And it is only in and through this that we are now ready to meet that reflection in physical form and dedicate fully to the fire of conscious partnership.

This action from and as Love is what is called for. This ever so delicate dance and balance of Being and action.

This approach – Divine timing and inspired action – action arising fully and wholly from our foundational commitment to Source and to serving Love – is a template, not only for intimate relationship and partnership of course, but for Love in action, for how we engage this Life dance. We are Divine Love and agreed to this incarnation to experience the catalytic opportunities of duality; to resolve separation and bring oneness – union fully embodied into form, thus expanding all consciousness.

There are times to rest and radiate. To deepen in to Presence and simply be as the light we are, reminding all souls of the light we all are emanations of. As we develop and integrate our Beingness more and more into form , we bring this into our daily practice of living. Into our engagements with the very mundane and ordinary aspects of life. Our businesses, families, relationships, our daily tasks.

Can we do so without losing flow? Can we sustain the intimate connection with all action moving from Source; from our Divine awareness?

It can come down to how well we listen. How well we know our heart. And the depth of our trust. Then how we walk. As all our choices, movements and actions move from this place we are shown the measure of how deeply we Love. And that mirror is the most powerful gift we can offer our own Being and all Beings.

And so it is.

I love you.

Helen serves Love light and the Divine through transmissions, consultation, events, retreats and writing. Connect through her site or facebook to find out more.

Autumn Equinox and the blood moon eclipse gateways


Many light workers and awakening souls have been acutely conscious of the portals of the tetrad of blood moons, birthing April 2014 through to the pinnacle in September 2015. Each of us will hear the stirring of guidance flowing into our awareness and hearts and through the collective consciousness that all of humanity is being given the opportunity to shift in ways that have not been available before.

It has been noted that Divine blueprints through the past six months in particular are shifting as quickly as they begin to express. It’s not that our intuition or inner guidance was mistaken but rather than the continual flow of transformation multi-dimensionally has a constant and fundamental effect on the potentials emerging.  The highest vibrational Cosmic beings and ascended teachers are also in perpetual evolution. Some designs are as ancient as the first Universes. Yet at the same time, simultaneously exiting possibilities co-exist all equally valuable for the expansion of Source.

This particular aspect of choice is a striking emergence as consciousness grows. As co-creators in human form for a brief blink in time, it is clear that now we are being given even more free will to partner with the highest levels of Source in deciding which course of action to follow. I witness a number of us called powerfully to specific sacred locations or power spots, only to find this shifts just as quickly and in many cases the work can be done entirely etherically, remotely – again releasing our human selves to new levels of liberation and choice in service of Spirit. What is noticeable is that a number of choices CO-EXIST all equally valid and in alignment. Of course each will carry its own unique vibrational flow and consequences.

And we are gently and firmly guided to know even more the truth of our own Master teacher within. The only and eternal place of all knowing, wisdom and every resource we may wish to call upon on our journey.

Many souls presently living on Earth feel a deep affinity to Egypt within them. Always have without any conscious understanding of why. Many more are noticing a “sudden” emerging of a magnetic pull, an emotional stirring, a longing and remembering beyond words.

Egypt is one of the primary keys on Earth to the connection between Divine Source and human consciousness. A portal for awakening and ascension it is a massive channel for information and energetic codes and has been so long prior to the ancient civilizations of Khem, Babylon or Egypt. In these coming weeks there will be a surging of gatherings across Earth– in person and through intentional use of the internet to co-ordinate global meditations and transmissions. Some of us find we are indeed called home to Egypt physically, some will know they are to assist in the light work from their own home location.

This is the age of unity consciousness and what we are asked to keep not only in the forefront of our awareness but even more vitally in the centre of our heart is that we are ALL, always connected. Separation from “other”, from the Divine is and has always been an illusion. We “re-find” our Divine Truth in aligning in in Unity – with a levels of our own Being and with every expression of God that we encounter; with every other soul having a human experience on this Earth school.

And so it is that there are gatherings – at many sacred sites, grid points, places of ceremony and ritual. And many who will sit quietly in presence in their own homes. What we are asked to attune to with full awareness is the call and vital nature of worldwide synchronisation. The creation of a vastly potent field of intent. An energetic field that hold the vibration – the Cosmic blueprint – of the highest potential for consciousness at this “time” – not only for humanity but rippling through all galaxies, all Universes and all dimensions.

We are more than six billion incarnated souls on this one tiny planet alone. Many cutting edge spiritual practitioners and wayshowers have partnered with hard science to bring forth the unequivocal evidence of the effects of consciousness on both matter and energy. The power of what we can effect as a unified filed of consciousness is so far beyond our comprehension but our souls know. We know in that deep, still place within the absolute magnificence of the Divine power that is in each one of us. As we come into harmonic convergence with our Divinity, we synchronise, vibrate in resonance with that spark in another and another. Each creating entrainment to raise the vibration further and exponentially increasing that which becomes possible.

The key is to trust the voice of your own heart. For this we must develop our skills and sense in how we listen to it. How we discern the familiar voice of the ego and the mind from the truth of the heart. Not the emotional heart – which is the doorway to deeper connection to our soul – but to our Divine Heart. Our Sacred heart space. How can this be known one may wonder….As we diligently apply our intent with courage and humility to peel off the numerous layers of conditioning, protection and identification with our beliefs; as we choose to let go of our identification with our emotions or investment in attaching or believing any stories around them, we begin to be liberated more fully into our clear heart space.

It takes many approaches of inner work/play along with a core and complete commitment to God/Source/All That is – above all else. Requirements that many choose not to attempt and that is perfect. But for those of us who do say yes to the path of the heart, we are blessed to be in human form on this incredible planet at these times that offer absolutely unprecedented opportunities and gateways for growth, evolution and expansion of All.

In our dedication and commitment we will be tested – again and again. Our discernment, our ability to stand in alignment and truth without stepping out of Love; whether we will fall prey to the lures of identifying with and acting or speaking from the ego self. If anything these “tests” are heightened for many Lightworkers. Partnerships dissolve, paradigms shift, seeming “securities” – employment, home, health, financial, relationships can evaporate. I witness this particularly intense amongst soul groups.

Many timelines are opening and can be running in parallel. This occurs only because we are ready at a soul level and collectively to address, heal and release distortions from them. It takes real diligence on a consistent basis to be aware that we may be stepping into playing out these other timelines. The key is never the “story” – where we can simply get lost again in the circumstances our souls created for our growth – but the teaching. What is the healing, the lesson that is being made available for us to see and embrace in this now, freeing all involved?

Again and again we are invited to let go, more and more deeply. Of our attachments in all forms; our identifcation with our wounds and suffering; of our investment in “controlling” our life according to the dictates or our own limited beliefs and conditioning.

At the same time as our deepest guidance can seem to fluctuate on a frequent basis – it could be easy to feel adrift and confused. So what is the anchor? The zero point that we can come to in the midst of any “experience” in this realm? The place where our timeless Heart beats as one with the Cosmic Heart. Where the breath that moves in and out of our physical form is the same breath breathing universes into life.

Knowing only that nothing is known but Love. That everything – everything – is birthed and constructed from Love. Creator and created indivisible as Love.

And so it is.

Helen dedicates her life to serving a path of love and light. Connect through her site or facebook for individual consultations, light transmissions, and events worldwide.

On Truth…

Oh this bright and beautiful morning; a morning of space, light and love. I offer a few reflections. As always unsure of what will through through this voice. This is the eve – for me of another important healing and light event – tomorrow – 3.3. at 3pm . In this case – for 333 – relating to the throat chakra. A week ago I was part of a stream of light with some 500 people. The energies created are held in a pool etherically above Glastonbury Tor, at the Earth’s heart chakra and being added systematically to the earth’s grids. What??? You may say!! Hey, I know…but its happening. You are probably feeling it regardless of the mind’s protestations! I have never experienced such an immensely powerful experience of collective energies.

The lessons that Life unfolds before us truly take my breath away. Last summer I became caretaker of a particular crystal skull and within days was guided to begin free global sacred healing transmissions, every month or so. Way out of my “comfort zone” but I am now well aware we don’t get to reside there any more (other than momentarily!)  if we are committed to a life of Love and service to the higher plan. I can’t begin to describe the unfoldings, miracles and changes that have occurred in even just the past six months – my blog gives snapshots here and there – but a stream of souls have come into my life, reawakening memories and deep understanding of who we each “are”. Returning soul aspects so that I/we can be all that we came to be.

A few month ago I connected to Sally Phillips weekly free healings online – knowing it was EXACTLY what I needed at that precise time of deep change. Fast forward and Sally is guided to involve me in “something” for 222, on 22.2. More information comes to us and Ramaso Atlantis Sun is the third anchor. So now a whole process of transmissions – and more – is emerging. I am now co-hosting the weekly Wednesday night healing spaces and there are seeds for various “physical” events planted.  From these experiences a multitude of other shoots, connections, (literal) journeys and doors are opening.

What is important is not the specifics of my particular experiences, – so many of us could tell wonderful stories  of synchronicities and transformation – but rather the deep and  awe-inspiring wonder that occurs when we witness the much, MUCH greater wisdom and force of Divine flow moving through us and our lives. And this is happening to more and more of us. As we align to who we truly are and we cast off the labels and limitations imposed on us. A good many of us have found this a fairly traumatic and life-altering experience in recent times – perhaps being asked to let go of long term relationships, jobs, family , health. Whatever no longer resonates with our highest good. All of this bringing us to a much deeper and clearer place of knowing Truth.

In one particular re-connection (and we two have not yet even met in the “physical” this life), the gifts of Truth have been particularly profound. On several occasions my body has summoned me to take what felt like a huge risk – of vulnerability – and speak my deepest Truth. The force of this call being too strong to ignore; the consequences of doing so too painful, I took a deep breath and shared. And….miracles, expansion, consequences rippling out that are so much vaster than one, or two, but affecting all (of course).

The joy that comes with placing oneself – finding oneself – in alignment with our deepest Truth is so deep and undefinable. Sure as we step into more and more unknown places there can still be temporary fear; the ego may be rebel, but in choosing Truth there is a fulfilment and Divine wholeness that cannot be measured. We find ourselves lining up to be and do exactly what we came here for, the mind somewhat baffled at how this can be, the soul sighing softly, eternally.

What is Truth? It is the beating of your Heart, the echoes that move through your blood cells, calling you, calling you. It is the fluttering in your belly that beckons you home. The lightness across your chest that invites risk and openness. Be daring. Be you….

So whether its a subtle whisper, a gripping in your belly or a quickening of your heart – on this bright morning, the world need Your Truth. No-one else’s. Not the safe story. Or the silence. But the truth of your beautiful, precious, unique Divine Heart and Life.force in the universe

Helen offers individual healing sessions, groups, classes and seminars globally, in person and through skype. Just email to arrange a suitable time. You can keep in touch through Luminosa on facebook and her website. Join the 333 transmission here or sign up for occasional newsletters.

Reflections and gratitude

Like so many I encounter at present, life has been exceptionally full, so there has not been much opportunity to really be still and reflect. So I make it a priority now, as we move through these last days of the year to reflect on the absolute gifts of every experience of this year; to release, clear, let go and open to what awaits.

I have found myself in Munich, Hamburg, Orgiva in Spain (twice!), Iona, Berlin, Lanzarote and Glastonbury!! Phew!! Iona and Glastonbury both long called me and have especially been deeply sacred homecomings for my soul with gifts beyond imagining. And then.. to find myself holding a Light Circle in Glastonbury at Winter Solstice with beautiful souls from Holland, New Zealand, France, England and Scotland…what joy!

In January 2013 I offered my very first Light Grids group, really stepping into a place of trust that all is guided. The Light Grids channel and work through Damien Wynne  now sits at the core of what I  bring through and is nothing short of incredible. Nine months later I stood before a hall of one hundred and fifty beautiful souls holding space for soul healing and transformation. Between there were so many experiences, just one of them an incredible week at Lendrick Lodge with Sandra Ingerman and a group called from many countries to share a week of deep Medicine for the Earth and Healing with Light.  I have been led to Mother, in the form of Saraswathi Ma, and will be organising her visits to Scotland in 2014.

when you teach

In July, I began holding regular Worldwide Healing Transmissions and experienced the sacred honour of all that is coming through this, with hundreds of souls in countries across the planet, also aware that I am stepping further into my calling of light work on a large and collective scale. This was birthed by one of the group of crystal skulls now coming onto my care, holders of such wisdom.

Seven years after my own Reiki Mastership training, it was time to sit with five women, guiding their start on their own Reiki Mastership journey. I began teaching Angel Healing, bringing a deeper connection to the angelic self to us all.

I had a realization in June that has altered my understanding in this Life at a core level and the vibrations from this continue to move through my Being, deeper, deeper…I have reconnected to so many beloved members of my soul family – and in the most amazing and synchronistic ways -and many of these connections have been major keys in my remembering of Self. The love and connection flowing through my Heart and Being now is so precious and life-giving and becomes stronger with every reminder of Oneness.

life is what we are

My work now is held by the name “Luminosa” and all the strands of my learning – from all lives – now weave more deeply into that which comes through me. The language of Light is coming through strongly as another key in my work. I AM more here than ever before….

In my “personal” life there have been both intense challenges and core shifts. One of my sons went through several months of physical, emotional, mental and spiritual turmoil which impacted on the whole family as he refused school and adopted very disturbed behaviours. The whole family were supported by Life and the incredible healing from beloved teachers to move through these transitions. There has been a deeper seeing of another son’s “challenges” and at the same time of his Self and beautiful Light. My twenty year marriage came to an end, after a long process, by mutual decision, with deep love and respect. I have no idea how Life will orchestrate things ahead on a practical level but the experience is a wonderful lesson in truly listening to the heart moment to moment and being ever vigilant for the mind jumping in. My trust has deepened and I am learning more and more deeply that the only way is to hand over completely to the Divine.

When I reflect on how I experienced Life and Self even a year ago, the shifts are huge, and I know, much greater than I fully appreciate. I will not even attempt to articulate the learnings and growths that have occurred these past months. More than anything, I come to the close of this year with such a profound sense of gratitude for every single experience – not just the obvious blessings, the joys – but every moment. The perceived “challenges”, the tears, the intense anger and frustration, the fears, the doubts, the grief…All of it, every moment has brought me closer to All That Is. Closer to the dissipation of further layers masking Self. Closer to Truth and the place where all is Love and Joy. Oneness.

I am deeply excited, happy and open to whatever 2014 brings. This is my wish for us all. All love to you.

Do connect to Helen at Luminosa or on facebook. I offer individual healing consultations and groups in the UK and globally.

Owning it all…

Today this blog is my therapist. Life is bringing me – of course exactly what I need for my growth. I need to express – here – with little idea of what is coming through (as is often the case!). It feels important for me to own and acknowledge all parts of me.

I see how I can resent the Light in my daughter. Her power. Her centred-on -self-ness. Part of me strives to stifle it to control it.

I see how I go into fury, intense frustration when I feel powerless to get my son back to school. He has been off  for three weeks (and five weeks last session). His health issues fluctuate wildly and he is clearly out of balance yet this is a call to much deeper healing.

I see, again, how my heart can be hard and I choose not to listen to it as the mind and ego jump into centre. I can close down to those I love.

I see, again, a preference to engage with certain activities of my choice in my own cocoon, rather than, truly, be with what is before me. Oh and I could go on….

Yes, I too see my Light, my heart, my beauty. I own that I am All. Darkness and Light. Clarity and insanity. I am (very) human…love and heart

I am opened by the raw courage of another (Jeff Brown) to face Truth and fully own all of one’s Self; the darkest parts, shining Light unflinchingly on Truth in sheer commitment to the path of the Heart. He observes

“Most of the greatest achievements on the planet are unknown to others- private overcomings, silent attempts at belief, re-opening a shattered heart.”

With my son, I have seen on a number of occasions – and been taught through my dreams -that what is arising through him is key to both our paths. He is asking me to be present and to support his soul healing and in so doing, of course, heal my own and a long held pattern between us.

I have engaged with this, but still have to wade through intense waves of resistance.  My frustrations simply mask my fears of being powerless; of getting lost in a sea of domestic responsibilities (with my five children) and therefore not fulfilling what I KNOW I am here to do. (whilst simultaneously witnessing the groundless base of this belief and knowing my Life is exactly as it is meant to be….).

I  witness how with this also comes along old energies of separation, self doubt, despair, apathy….Oh I can see it, know it as illusion but it still needs to shift..and its all shifting!! (I loved a recent comment about the only difference between sh*t and shift is and “f” – a very important “f” which changes the perspective radically.) Walking and breathing out my frustrations this morning, I connected to some favourite trees and laughed at the clarity. My son has been off since the first day of a spiritual initiation in Divine Empowerment…So the Universe perfectly orchestrates the circumstances to bring up and clear my illusions about power and powerlessness, and to empower my son to truly, finally own his Light and trust – me, Life and himSelf.

He didn’t go to school today. I don’t know if he will tomorrow. I continue to work through my responses: to own them honestly, apologising and acknowledging my confusion; to move to be present in my heart, in my confusion, not always able. But I do know I am learning a great deal, on the ground, in the thick of Life..and it continues thick and fast, in this sea of planetary and galactic shifts that we are immersed in. Part of my process with my son at this time is hearing and answering his spirit’s call for help, discerning this from the drama and games  but also seeing where and how to call on other supports. We are doing “personal” work but, of course, in context of profound collective shifts in vibration. (There’s that “s” word again!)

It has been a pattern of clearing each day recently then touching balance and centredness once more, faster and faster it seems. And so I – we – are called on to, more than ever, remember what we know, remember and use our tools to re-align to centre. To not be drawn into the dramas, the illusions of the mind. As I walked out my anger this morning, I sensed a team of angels marching behind me, with fake serious expressions, mimicking my own and I could only laugh at the absurdity of myself, caught in my mini-drama in that moment. And that laughter freed me. There is spaciousness within. It is always there, even in the midst of insanity! Liberation from the mind, unto the eternal essence.

Let me offer this, in closing – The Warrior’s Prayerwarrior

“I am what I am.
In having faith in beauty within me I develop trust.
In softness I have strength.
In silence I walk with the gods.
In peace I understand myself and the world.
In conflict I walk away.
In detachment I am free.
In respecting all living things I respect myself.
In dedication I honour the courage within me.
In eternity I have compassion for the nature of all things.
In love I unconditionally accept the evolution of others.
In freedom I have power.
In my individuality I express the God-Force within me.
In service I give of what I have become.
I am what I am:
Eternal, immortal, universal, and infinite.
And so be it.” ~Stuart Wilde

I share healing and teaching in person and worldwide. Do connect through my website or facebook page.

Sailing on the Sea of Infinity

Life is a miracle. Full of surprises from moment to moment – when we drop down, stop trying to control, when we touch that eternal place that maybe we had lost or forgotten. When we open our eyes, wide, drop into quietness and open to that which we are born unto. Five years ago I first met a man – a beautiful, beautiful man – who has touched my soul and helped return me home, in ways I could never have imagined, nor yet describe. I was not looking; not searching. I had heard friends talk of him for a year or two. I was open, curious to find out for myself if there was anything there…

I knew immediately that this was something special and deeply powerful and felt the effects ripple through me and my life for months, but it was two years later when my whole perception experienced a massive and spontaneous expansion.  I suddenly found myself with “a teacher”; never having considered that I was looking, nor “ready” for one. I also found myself travelling away from my family to other countries to experience the workshops with him, with no idea of what would unfold. I wept at beauty beyond anything I had conceived of. I experienced Divine Love flooding my bones. I was swept in the storm of remembering and never again wanting to forget, yet knowing I would. I am so profoundly grateful to experience a dance like no other.Image

The past years since those moments of seismic shift have brought gifts, transformation and miracles beyond anything I could have conceived. Life just expands and expands. As I dip my toe in, with more and more joy and freedom and curiosity, I feel the ocean, limitless, of which I am.


We are all on this  blue planet, a small boat, hurtling through space. I look up at the stars, knowing my body belongs to this earth, but where did I come from? Where will I go when I leave this boat?

Whilst on this planet, I am here to express what is in my heart and soul and I do this best, it seems, through writing. It can feel overwhelming to attempt to express not only the deeply personal but the un-knowable, but it also feels important to offer something of my truth, as I can, in this moment. Ask me who I am and I can only say I am of Life. I am Life. Infinite. Un-knowable. Ask me what he is to me and all I can say is that I touch a tiny, tiny drop of who he is and what this experience brings forth and what I do not know is so much vaster. I glimpse his phenomenal understanding of how the mind works , and what the body is, and he is so deeply in his bones and blood that through him can flow a vastness that takes my breath away. And thus he shows me Life/the Universe – what is in me and of me.

All I can say I know is that he brings me home. For this my love and gratitude are soul-deep and eternal.

Emaho, you have helped this soul, my soul. That you can know.

You can contact Helen or explore her work on her website or on facebook