Tag Archives: view

A Shift of Perspective

How interesting the times when chunks of our words “disappear” from the computer, as just happened to me for perhaps the third time today, including a more or less completed blog…!

For a week or two, I have been experiencing waves of resistance of a depth and intensity unknown to me previously. Storms of negativity that I find myself swept in yet just as quickly can be gone. I notice layers and layers of  resistance – to beautiful people coming from their heart, to my very life and its circumstances, and to Life itself.  Judgement, intolerance and explosive rage. Yet in between, I am happy, motivated, passionate. Interestingly, I have not encountered direct resistance to my own spiritual practices. So the cloak of the ego slips further and I see more clearly the ploy to lure me into swallowing the old beliefs, strategies, the twists and tricks to separate me from myself/others.

Life has been so very full and I am taken aback at the pace of time. So it has been particularly difficult to create any space to just be with myself. I have felt this keenly when I so long for inner space. Nevertheless, to the best I could, I connected to the full moon the last few nights, in ceremony. She only showed herself for the briefest of moments last night, allowing the clouds to part and shining her light upon me. Those few seconds remind me of Truth, of Light. That I am much, much more than my internal struggles.

This morning I chose to go for a short walk before my meditation class, feeling apathy and frustrations and not good about my lack of patience and kindness with my daughter. A view down through some trees to a river catches my eye and I decide to follow my intuition. I walk down and find myself in a place I have never before been, despite living in this town eight years and knowing it for decades. As I follow the river along, the land opens out into a beautiful green space and off to the side a waterfall gushes, fed by the melting of recent snows. I reflect on how a turn of the head or shift of viewpoint can open up a completely new horizon and experience. This has always been right here.

I stand before the waters letting them wash though me. As I gently shift into a more allowing attitude towards the storms within, I notice they have gently and effortlessly dissipated. And in the space is more softness, gentle opening, and even a sense of appreciation and wonder towards the bare trees silhouetted against the low morning sun, the light playing on the water, the sticks and mud under my boots.

At the same time I realise that even through turbulent storms within, there is an absence of a desire to seek answers or “fixing” by someone or something. I realise that I have quietly somehow  come to know and accept of my own inner teacher, my own Master, more than ever before. I have all I need within. Sometimes we are just called to go a bit deeper, to shift our perspective again and again.

As I gaze out of the window now, some hours later, I see the trees sway in the winds and the rain batters against the window panes. The storm may not be far away but I know I can choose to shift. To shift my viewpoint. To realign with myself – my deepest self, the one who is becoming unborn, unknown, and infinite. In truth who always has been.Image

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“Atlantis”

So now I find myself, quite literally, “on top of the world”. I look upon the sun above the volcano, the wash of the ocean surrounds me, a wave of peace sits above the meditation garden. I am alone and yet so utterly “not-alone”. Surrounded – above and below beyond all my imaginings by the gifts of Life, seen and unseen. And now this knowledge is in my heart. It is in my cells. I have – truly  -allowed the Light in – through clearing away the lower vibrations of doubt, insecurity, lack of trust, lack of self belief. Now I invite it ALL. I welcome it ALL. I live in my body, a full and brilliant spirit, here to embody and share Source and all His/Her brilliance.

I have no pull or desire to go back into the past right now. I am so much more able to BE in the present moment, with WHATEVER it brings. What are the teachings of the present? Can we pause, sink down into our hip bones? Breathe into each of our cells? What is below my feet? Where is the earth? The body will bring me into the now. And in the now, I am freed to open and receive gifts beyond imagining.

This week – of Light Grids with Damien Wynne on Tenerife, at the foot of Mount Teide – has blasted every cell withthe highest vibration of Light energy available to us on the planet. I have bathed in a bottomless ocean of unconditional love, so deep, so expansive, I could only breathe deeper, let go, falling into it, sobbing at times, becoming one. At times every muscle in my body has vibrated, pain has come suddenly and gone too, ancient fears and traumas brought to the light. And through it all, I was truly, for the most part, HERE. Present. Willing. Alive.

Though this work reaches and brings in the highest energies, it is very much about how we live, in the day, in the moment, in the nitty-gritty of our lives. So for a week, I was held softly in a nurturing, earthy, damp dark room, with no light, no view and tree energy painted strongly on the wall by my bed. Now I have been given yet another gift – raised up to the huge rooftop terrace, the ocean sweeping before me and above is the volcano (the mountain where I had my bag, money, cards and all my “identity” stolen last week..) Oh and this room, that Damien occupied  before me, is called..”Atlantis”. I think I get it Life…!!

The gratitude flows out from my cell membranes permeating the soft air next to my skin, carried by the breeze, which is calmer now after a day of stormy winds and heavy rain. I feel the open-ness, the pregnant quality of the atmosphere of me. I am -deeply -ready. Resistance has floated off, almost unnoticed at times, but the teachings remain. New awareness feels strong within my biological cells, my core.

In “showing up”, being here and meeting whatever has arisen 100%, I have moved up -and home- to bathe in the Light, in the magnificence of all. There are no words to express my gratitude -to Damien, to every single soul I have connected with, not just here but across all lives, to the Great Mystery, the Divine and, importantly, to myself -for doing the work with courage and integrity. This  especially at such a critical time in our collective transformation and evolution, for honouring my essence and its expression on this planet, for being HERE, more than ever before, having relaimed lost fragments of my soul power from across time. More whole, more ready and able to embody and use my Divine Power on Earth, I am ready to serve. The lessons of my pasts have opened their teachings so I am clearer and freeer than ever before to be All that I am. As we clear the issues, I receive the gifts of Atlantis and beyond,  being with it all, in the now.